NEAT & SIMPLE LIVING

Tackle It Tuesday - Inspiring Organizing Makeover Photos!

If you are looking for inspiration and examples of Do-it-Yourself organizing makeovers, you will LOVE the Tackle it Tuesday posts on the 5 Minutes For Mom Blog!

Tackle it Tuesday was created by Janice and Susan, identical twins and founders of 5 Minutes for Mom as a way to motivate themselves and others to get their homes under control!  Each week on Tuesday, they post before and after pictures of a project or trouble area that was tackled this week. Many Moms are participating! 
http://www.5minutesformom.com/category/blogging/meme/tackle-it-tuesday/

Read more about the background here:
http://www.5minutesformom.com/160/tackle-it-tuesday-update/

I love this idea!  What a creative use of blogging!  It doesn't have to be a big project...any little thing will do! 

UNDER THE KITCHEN SINK

Even though I did this a while ago, I'm sharing the before and after pix from my under the kitchen sink project!

BEFORE

When we moved in 5 years ago, I used an old dish drainer and a blue basket you can barely see in the back...but the stuff had outgrown the containers and it was a pain to get to stuff!

AFTER

The dish drainer got donated and I got a locker shelf from Staples and a shelf/basket unit from my Neat Living Store to  organize things better! The blue basket now has all my plant watering & feeding stuff.  (Yes, I use an old water bottle : )  And the shelf/basket with drawer is PERFECT for holding sponges and smaller stuff.  I love it! It's really great quality too. And it fits perfectly in my small sink cabinet.  Every other time I had tried to buy a similar unit at LNT or something, I had to return them for being too big.  So be sure to measure first!

You can get the shelf/basket (FREE SHIPPING TOO!) here http://www.organizedshoppingcart.com/product_detail.php?product_id=1107&ref=1123439731

Time Management - Is doing something better than doing nothing? Can you still make a difference?

John Trosko over at OrganizingLA Blog: made a particularly intriguing post last week inspired by the Ask Marilyn column.  John shares many great tips and ideas on getting organized, life, blogging & more.  But this post just stopped me in my tracks! I'm going to let you just read it for yourself : ) 

Here's the post followed by my response: 

The Ask Marilyn Column in last Sunday's Los Angeles Times Parade Magazine had an interesting question and we'd like to share it.  It has everything to do with organizing, and creating new habits.  We'll post the entire question and answer here, breaking every copyright law known in media.  But you can click here to check out Marilyn vos Savant's other archives and her new online headquarters

Question:

"Please settle an argument. My friend believes that if you take a single vitamin, you will be just a little healthier than if you never had taken one. Or if you park a car inside a garage only two or three times, its body will be in better condition than if you hadn’t, even if the difference is so small you can’t see it. His reasoning is that something is always better than nothing. I disagree. What do you think? —Gary Manata, Carlsbad, Calif."

Answer:

"I think he’s wrong. The difference must be large enough to matter in some way—any way—or nothing is “better.” Something has been lost: time. Whether your friend is taking a vitamin or parking his car, he is spending precious time—which is a limited resource—and maybe money. Too many people spend time and money pursuing lots of goals just a little. - Marilyn"

Are you wasting time in your daily life only getting your feet wet persuing your organizational goals?

http://organizingla.blogs.com/organizingla_blog/2006/07/time_management.html

MY RESPONSE:
What a thought provoking post!!!  But I have to disagree with Marilyn. For a genius her logic is rather faulty!

I believe that doing something is almost always better that doing nothing!  Especially when it comes to exercising and organizing! Doing "something" won't get you all the benefits of doing it perfectly, but it's better to tread water than to do nothing and drown.

Good habits can get started with small actions. Like putting your toes in the water, then your legs, etc. It may be "better" to dive in and get it over with, but some people can't take the stress of that and will never do it again if it's too painful.

Walking a little extra 2-3 times per week, to me is a great thing. After a couple weeks of that, the person may start to feel better enough to walk 4-5 times per week, etc. If they don't walk at all, their health will suffer even worse.

All or nothing thinking is often what keeps people from getting started organizing at all (as well as many other things) I think people have to try and do what they can towards a goal.

They don't have to organize the whole house at once. They could start with a drawer, or start letting go of one thing per day until it gets easier to let go of things.

Imagine if everyone said, "well, I can't recycle everything, so I won't recycle anything." I believe it's better to recycle what you can and not sweat being perfect.

To me, having too many goals and only doing all of them part way is a different issue. But even that is probably better than having no goals at all. : )

What do you think?

All the best,

10 Tips for Reaching a Goal

Here's a neat nugget from an older post at the The Happiness Project. Gretchen Rubin quotes 10 tips from Émile Coué on Reaching a Goal.

Here are my Top 3 favorites.

• Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good. It’s better to do something imperfectly than nothing perfectly. 
• Always think of what you have to do as easy and it will become so.
• Sometimes it helps to keep the stakes low at the beginning, so you feel less worried about making a mistake; sometimes it helps to keep the stakes high from the beginning, so you're not tempted to slack off.

                                                                    Émile Coué.

Read More at http://www.happiness-project.com/happiness_project/2006/03/this_wednesday_.html

I couldn't resist this goals grid, neat huh?

Goals Grid - Source = http://www.flickr.com/photos/legweak/65711109/

The Happiness Project - Now that's Neat Living!

Now here's a really neat way to spend a year of your life!  Gretchen Rubin is writing a book and an amazing blog called The Happiness Project. It's about spending a year testing every principle, tip, rule, theory, and scientific study about happiness and reporting on what works!  How cool is that????  She includes so much neat stuff that I'm going to have to do a series a posts about her.  This is definitely one of those must- see - "wish I'd thought of that, but I could not have said it better myself"  blogs!

I think the Happiness Project is a FABULOUS idea.  And it has inspired me share my thoughts on happiness here with you - because you really can't experience true happiness without learning to let go of emotional and physical clutter from the past and without establishing a peaceful order in your life.  Not perfection, but a sense of order.

 
Happiness for me, at least, was VERY hard won.  I grew up on welfare in a very violent, abusive home with angry alcoholic parents. My father finally left us alone (thankfully) when I was 8 and I haven't seen him since.  The violence didn't end there though. My next stepfather was almost as bad.  My mother took out her frustration on her kids, and on a succession of boyfriends and husbands.

Happiness Poster - Photo source:
http://flickr.com/photos/justinshattuck/198831800/

Without going into lots of gory detail on my life story, let's just say that I developed a very strong need to be responsible, especially for my younger siblings, a strong need for order to counteract the clutter and emotional chaos in my childhood, a strong need to please, to achieve, and to basically be perfect - perfect grades, perfect home, perfect work assignments, and to have perfectly happy bosses, students and clients.

I moved out of my mother's apt. (can't call it home) the first time when I was 12 to be a live-in babysitter and housekeeper for a single mom.  I got a job and my own small apartment when I was just 14 - so that I could help my 4 younger siblings get away from my mother.  I took on a lot of survivor's guilt for being the oldest and strongest of 5 kids and took on a lot of responsibility as well.  I also had a lot of distrust, fear and disappointment just under my perfectly responsible surface.  Even today I have a hard time sharing my imperfections, but I've gotten much better about it.  As you can imagine I was anything BUT happy.

I can actually vividly remember the first time I started to feel like I had found peace in the world.  The first time I felt truly deeply happy.  Not just the momentary earned happiness of getting good grades, getting a rave review from a client, or getting a good job or promotion.  I mean really feeling happy with my imperfect self and feeling just peaceful existing in the world.

It was just after I turned 40, the culminations of all my struggles, achievements, and learnings finally started to sink in. I remember a deep peaceful feeling of acceptance, forgiveness, faith, and of letting go - letting go of the past, letting go of failures, letting go of my expectations that I would be married and have children by the time I was 40.  Instead I had memories of 5 broken engagements and several abusive relationships.

I also had a lot of career successes that I had thought would make me happy - but didn't - I let go of that too. And I started to let go of physical stuff that was associated with a past I didn't want to carry around with me any longer.  It was incredibly freeing to release stuff I kept out of sentiment and fear of letting go. Something clicked and I finally let go of the parts of me that were on hold - waiting for someone else to join me in life.

Peace without Borders Photo Contest Entry
Photo Source: http://flickr.com/photos/cybercare/57049784/

I started to feel a deeper faith in the universe - faith that things would be okay  - even if they didn't turn out exactly the way I dreamed of as a kid hiding in my closet.  I stopped dating and stopped worrying about pleasing other people.  I started to create new dreams and fulfill them on my own.

For example, I traveled to Spain - alone!! Something I NEVER thought I would do.  I always thought I would go to my ancestral country and see where my grandmother was born and raised (Malaga and Marbella) on my honeymoon.  It turned to be the beginning of my honeymoon with myself.  Traveling alone for me was the ultimate expression of my faith that everything would be okay.  I finally became truly happy being alone in the world.

Oddly enough, a few months later I met my husband to be!   We never really dated though.  We were "just friends" right up until we realized we were in love.  Anyway, it boils down to this.  In my 46 years of living, I've finally found that my ultimate deep happiness comes from what I DO with my life, what I LET GO OF in my life, and what I BELIEVE about the world.  Whenever I do nothing, or whenever I hold on to unrealistic expectations, or attach too much importance to things, I become unhappy.

Happiness for me is a by-product of:

• Having faith and believing things will all work out even if I can't make it work out my way.
• Having goals and accomplishing them
• Taking care of myself & my family (Exercising, keeping my home organized and clean, my marriage and my pets)
• Helping other people overcome their life obstacles (This is the greatest high for me - and making a living doing it, helps me be able to do it more!  It's the best career move I ever made)
• Being actively grateful for all the good things in my life - every day
• Letting go - not only of physical stuff but of emotional baggage as well.  When I stopped expecting myself and other people to be a certain way and learned to forgive myself and others for human foibles and weaknesses, I became gradually more peaceful and happy

Learning to let go of most of the anger, fear and anxiety of my childhood; And, actively accepting the paradoxes of being human in an imperfect world that can be so cruel, violent, hypocritical and randomly horrifying, as well as stunningly beautiful and kind, was not easy, but it was essential to my happiness.   

For me, happiness was and is a by-product of loving, letting someone love me their way, trusting even while accepting that people will let me down, forgiving them when they do, keeping my life and home in reasonable order - not perfection, doing work I am deeply passionate about, and practicing being grateful everyday for what I have, and being kind to people.

It may sound hoaky or corny, but every day, my husband and I express something we are grateful about, something we appreciate about having the other in our lives.  It's so easy to take each other for granted.  Expressing to each other what we are thankful for really keeps love, respect, kindness and appreciation alive for us.

Kindness Graph Source:
http://flickr.com/photos/51453931@N00/73796459/

So that's my story - long - yet actually short!  After all, Gretchen Rubin is going to write a whole book about Happiness!  : )

If you got this far, thanks for reading my story! If you have a minute to share, I would to love to hear your answers to this question: 

Where does your happiness come from?

"I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances."
- Martha Washington (1732 - 1802) 

“Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort”
- Franklin D Roosevelt

Source: http://quotes.wordpress.com/tag/happiness-quotes/

For more about The Happiness Project visit Gretchen's amazing Blog!

Sending Neat and Happy thoughts,

How to have the "I want to quit my job" conversation with your spouse

If you are thinking about escaping from your corporate job and starting your own business, such as maybe becoming a professional organizer, you may need some advice on how to talk to your spouse about it. 

Here are some great tips from Pamela Slim's blog "Escape from Cubicle Nation" followed by a tip from me!

How can I tell my spouse that I want to quit my job without him/her getting scared and/or defensive?

I fondly call this "The Conversation" and pick up the same amount of anxiety as if they were telling their kids about the birds and the bees for the first time.

The short answer is that there is no way to predict or direct your spouse's reaction to your news since that is totally outside of your control.  But here are some ways to ensure that the conversation, or more likely series of conversations, goes well:

(Just to avoid endless s/he and him/her, I will use the male form of spouse in this article)

1. Choose a low-stress moment when you have time and energy for a long conversation.  It is not fair to drop a major bombshell when you won't have time to talk about it.  Don't talk about this right before bed or in the morning before heading off to work, as this will just stir up questions in your spouse's mind.
2. Choose a good place to talk.  I find it is a lot easier to have a deep, meaningful conversation with my husband when we are up and moving around.  We have had some of our best conversations on long walks or drives.  One of the Mars/Venus theorists (I don't remember who) said that men converse better while moving while women like to be sitting face-to-face, peering into the others eyes.  Because you should be concerned about your spouse's communication style, choose the place that he feels the most comfortable with. 
3. Minimize distractions.  Get your kids a sitter, turn off your cellphone and Blackberry and don't go somewhere like your favorite local cafe where you will be interrupted by lots of friends.  You want uninterrupted time.
4. Explain why you are so excited about starting your own business.  Make sure your spouse knows all about why this idea is so compelling to you and why you are excited about it.  Don't just talk about the business idea, talk about what it would mean to you personally to get enjoyment from your work.  Would you have more energy?  Would you watch less TV?  Want to help around the house more?  Become a 19-year old sex machine?  (OK, OK, now you are going overboard)
5. Explain the consequences of not following your dreams.  Everyone processes job stress differently.  Some people have a high tolerance for staying in an unhappy or stressful work situation if it means bringing home lots of money.  Others have very low tolerance and develop health problems including depression, high blood pressure, weight problems, anxiety disorders and low energy.  Make sure your spouse understands the consequences to you if you are unhappy with your work.
6. Expect a lot of resistance.  I have practiced change management long enough to know that even if someone perceives a change as a good thing (i.e. getting married, having a baby, getting a promotion and raise), he will still feel a certain amount of resistance.  It can be very, very scary for your spouse to think about losing his perception of stability (you know where I stand with the notion that jobs are more stable than self employment).  Don't get angry if he doesn't immediately support your idea. 
7. Ask lots of questions to understand the resistance.  Your spouse may say something like 

Read more at:  http://www.escapefromcubiclenation.com/get_a_life_blog/2006/07/how_to_have_the.html

Okay, here's my tip.

When I had "the Conversation" with my husband, I used my home budget spreadsheet and created a couple versions showing best and worst case scenarios in meeting our monthly bills without income from me.  I also included a list of all the areas where we could cut our monthly expenses until the business became profitable.

Before discussing it with him, I knew exactly the minimum amount of money I needed to bring in monthly to keep us afloat and presented a back up plan for earning that money if my new business didn't produce a profit within 6 months. Thankfully, the business has become profitable enough to cover my minimum contribution plus a little extra and I haven't had to exercise the backup plan. But it was comforting to my husband to know I had one.

In terms of quality of life, we are both so much happier now and feeling like I'm doing something meaningful is priceless, so at least for now I feel like leaving "cubicle nation" was the best decision I ever made!

Best,

Neat Ideas For Living: Why live frugally? Why organize?

I just found this really neat blog Simple Living America with a great post by Dawn who writes an awesome blog on living simply and frugally, Frugal for Life.   She wrote this great post on why she lives frugally and what it means to her.

"I guess when it comes down to being frugal or not, the question needs to be asked, “Does this fulfill me?” For myself less is more in my world; less to worry about, less to find space for, less to keep up."

This really got me thinking about my approach to organizing and what's fulfilling to me.  There are some organizers who prefer to work with people who have collections that need extensive organizing.  Like devoting a whole room with custom closet systems just for shoes.  Or maybe a whole room devoted to gift wrapping.  But that just isn't fulfilling for me. 

I find it most fulfilling to work with people who want to simplify their lives - even if they have plenty of money and don't have to be frugal.  I love working with people who want to have less stuff to worry about so they can have more time and energy to focus on things are more important meaningful to them.  For example:

• The stressed out mom who wants to get organized so she can relax and be more able to enjoy her children instead of yelling at them out of frustration because she can't find stuff she is looking for.
• The couple who fight over clutter instead of enjoying time playing with their kids.
• The lady who is distraught because she just found out she got charged ridiculous late fees because she lost a bill and didn't pay it on time. The money could be much better spent on healthier food for her family or getting a massage.
• The professional running a small business out of their home that could be doing a lot better if only they could fulfill orders efficiently, show up on time, not lose client data, organize their paperwork, or keep track of their marketing, etc.
• The mom who feels guilty because her kids are embarassed to bring friends home from school and is worried because they avoid being home as much as possible and may be getting into trouble.

Dawn also says:

"Frugality in my opinion is also about moderation. Moderation is key no matter if I am eating, drinking, watching TV, going to movies or exercising. Excess is what happens when I stop controlling my life and let something else run it. It’s about keeping things in check, whether it’s my reasoning for buying and item or getting caught up in the good feeling a TV commercial gives me. "

Moderation is key to Neat Living!  Every now and then I get a call from someone who fears they aren't organized enough, yet when I go their home it looks like a page out of a magazine. Perhaps they are so bombarded with images of perfection in the media they judge themselves very harshly.  They are often relieved when I tell them they are normal and it's okay to have some papers on your desk while working.  It's okay to process your mail once a week.  If you work 12 hours a day and don't have time to go through every day, DON'T!  : )   (But do at least contain it in a basket till you are ready to deal with it)

The thing is it is possible to overdo it with organizing and even with de-cluttering.  You ARE ALLOWED to have sentimental stuff!  It's okay if there are kid's toys not put away, or clothes hanging on the back of the chair in your bedroom.  You can even keep clothes you haven't worn in a year!  Living isn't "neat" ALL the time! 

It's about balance and moderation.  You only need to be neat and organized enough so that your stuff isn't stressing you out or impeding your ability to function effectively. It's about YOU running your life and YOU deciding what's important. If you are organized enough to be on time for work most of the time, be a good spouse and parent, entertain in your home without shame, and find 90% of things you need when you need them.  You are doing a great job!   

Okay, so I got off the subject of frugal living a little bit, forgive me...and go read more of Dawn's thought-provoking post here! : )

Simple Living America: Why live frugally?.

I'm officially "linked-in"!

 

I was delighted yesterday to be the recipient of this week's Linkedin Bloggers Blog Boost. As a result of these wonderful people taking time out to link to me, I've had over 80 something new visitors!  I hope you all found something worthy of your time here.

It's a very warm feeling when 13 talented and accomplished bloggers take time out to write about and link to your blog all in one day.  It's like a great big hug.  Very hard to describe.  But also very humbling. Their blogs are all so clever, witty and interesting.  I learned a lot from them and will do my best to live up to the standards of excellence they have put out there.

I sincerely appreciate not only the boost to my readership, but also the boost to my spirit.  It makes all the hard work and countless hours I've spent writing and learning to become a better blogger worthwhile.  After all, what's the point if no one reads what you have to share?  Even just one person letting you know that you have helped or inspired them is enough to keep me going for weeks, but 13 people all at once?  I just got a motivational boost that will keep me writing all summer!

Thanks to all you who have linked to this blog and let me know that I'm doing okay here.  And I'll keep looking to your blogs for ideas help me become even better.

Jessica Duquette, My Mentor & The Diva of Letting Go
http://www.its-not-about-your-stuff.com/2006/05/how_does_clutte.html

Sarah Lewis, Author of an EXCELLENT blog on Frugal and Simple Living
http://www.frugalunderground.com/2006/05/31/featured-frugal-blog-neat-living/

Tracy Coenen, who writes a very interesting blog about Corporate Fraud and other Financial topics - She's also an Alum of Arthur Anderson!
http://www.sequence-inc.com/fraudfiles/?p=213

Steve Remington, A guy who tells you what NOT to do with your blog and lots more! Coming from him, I'm ecstatic that he likes my blog.  I feel like Sally Field at the Oscars!
http://www.whymyblogstinks.com

Dennis McDonald, A really cool blog on living with technology.
http://www.ddmcd.com/personal_technology.html

Patrick Dodd, who shares tips on Corporate Blogging
http://corpblog.shadowbox.com/2006/05/31/better-organization-the-key-to-better-blogging/

Bill Austin, A Master of Blogging, who has lots of neat blogs sharing quotes and recipes and more!
http://quotes.wordpress.com/2006/05/31/clutter-quotes/
http://www.quotescentral.com/2006/05/31/649/
http://www.worldfamousrecipes.com/index.php/979

Mirona Iliescu - A Cool Chick from Romania - with a very creative blog
http://gorgeoux.blogspot.com/2006/05/diamonds-in-your-garbage-bin.html

Jim Durbin, A Branding Guru who also offers some great insights into the history of blogging.
http://durbinmedia.com/brandstorming/2006/05/clutter-and-small-business.asp

Rick Roberge, with tips on how to grow from a single provider to a service Firm.
http://www.therainmakermaker.com

Marc Freedman, a leader in FileSharing, gave a really creative name to the topic of donating your computer.
http://www.p2p-weblog.com/50226711/wipe_before_you_flush.php

Juan Pablo Mattenet, From Belgium liked the idea of having a Clutter Date with his wife : )
http://ceundies.blogspot.com/2006/05/neat-living-blog-neat-ideas-for-living.html

Thanks to all of you!  And to Flickr.com for the awesome photos.

The BIG HUG STUFFED ANIMAL photo is from Dave Peckens http://www.flickr.com/photos/davepeckens/

Clearing Clutter - Why clutter and debt are related and it isn't ALL your Fault

WHY CLUTTER ISN'T ALL YOUR FAULT

In many ways, it's not entirely your fault you have a lot of clutter.  You'd have to spend a lot of time researching to really understand how the so-called marketing "geniuses" of the world use their knowledge of marketing and human psychology to manipulate your basic human drives and get you to acquire the stuff they are selling - whether you need the stuff or not. 

You'd have to be as devious as they are to even imagine the lengths marketing strategists go to deliberately to manipulate you by direclty marketing to your kids.  It's hard to imagine people would use kids on purpose to get you to buy stuff - but they do.  Marketing gurus work hard to figure out how to get kids to nag you into buying them stuff. They call it the "NAG FACTOR" and they aren't even a little ashamed of themselves.

You'd have to be a super human to resist the social and cultural pressures that tempt us to accumulate stuff far beyond our real needs.

I became a professional organizer partly because I wanted to be part of the backlash against out of control addictive attachment to the "things" in our lives.  Intense attachment to things and addictively using various elements of the external world to manage and / or escape from my intense inner emotional life played a huge part in how clutter and debt reached debilitating levels in my life.  By the time I was 30 (1989) I had gotten in over my head with over $25,000 in debt.   

How I Got Into and Out of $25,000 in Debt

 

I got my first credit card in 1978.  This was the beginning of the "unsecured" credit era.  Before that, if you wanted something you had to have the cash, put it on lay-a-way and make payments, or take out a loan which was seucred by some other asset such as your car or home.  

Going to a sotre and being able to take home whatever you wanted using a piece of plastic that was not connected to money you actually had felt weird at first.  It was a strange idea that some mysterious corporation was paying for it and just trusting you to pay it back eventually.  

It quickly became intoxicating though as you began to experience the instant gratification of being able to take home whatever you needed NOW.  Soon, it was taking home whatever you wanted.  Wants began to feel like needs and it was became easier and easier to justify buying things you couldn't pay for.  

Spending was so easy.  But paying the bills at the end of the month got harder and harder.  Credit cards were so new then that there was no one around to teach you how to strategize using credit cards and paying the bills.  I had always prided myself on paying my bills even it was late.  So when I found myself unable to make minimum payments, it was so embrassing and shameful.  I had no idea who to turn to and even if there was someone who could help I was too embarrassed to ask.

Eventually, by the late 80's I had over $25,000 in crippling credit card debt. That was more than whole year's BEFORE taxes salary back then.  Interest rates were 18% and up. There were no 0% interest offers.  My interest charges alone were over $700 per month. That was a real shocker.

Thankfully, my career path led me to work for Arthur Andersen - an accounting and auditing firm.  They required all employees in the professional education division I was part of to take basic financial accounting and auditing training as well as learning to use financial management tools like Excel, budgeting and financing strategies.

It was a revelation. It took me about 3 years to figure out that I could use those business concepts and skills and use them to deal my own debt.  I got over my aversion to dealing with money by learning how it worked and realizing that mastering moeny was my real ticket to freedom in life.  The only way I could ever have the career and life I dreamed of was to understand money and how to use it to SERVE me and my goals.  

That deeper purpose gave me the conviction to take the time to design a budget and cashflow spreadsheet in Excel that made it easy for me to see where I could "play" with how I was spending money so that I could allocate as much as possible to getting out of debt.  I began to think of buying things I couldn't pay for as putting myself in handcuffs and sentencing myself to a life of being a powerless tortured victim of a money game I didn't know how to play.  

Instead of filing bankruptcy, became determined to learn enough about the money game to master it and make it a non-issue in my life.  Determined to make a fresh start and climb out of my money prison, I sold nearly everything I owned and moved in with a roomate for a few years.  By rethinking and figuring out needs vs. wants, I was able to use my creativity to spend a lot less money and still meet my needs.  I also found ways to design my own game, rules, shortcuts and strategies to design simple ways to work with a budget without feeling like I was being controlled or having to deprive myself of what I enjoyed in life.  I realized that being fully conscious about my money situation, and strategizing how I used my money actually made it easier to get what I wanted in ADDITION to making sure I had what I needed.  I realized that learning to play the money game was EMPOWERING not enslaving.  

ti took about 3 years, bit I finally worked my way out of debt and got that clean slate I so craved.  The experience was one of the most painful but also one of the most upleveling and defining phases of my life.  Money was actually starting to become a non-issue in my work life.  The experience helped me start to learn that I could let go of stuff and survive.  I could live with a lot less and I learned how easy it was to become "spoiled" by having more than you need.  It's so easy to think you NEED things rather to just enjoy the things you have.  

I learned first hand the value and immense power that comes from living below your means.  I learned that saving money is not about depriving yourself, it's about empowering yourself to not be a slave to money.  To this day I refuse to carry unsecured debt and only use my credit card for what I KNOW I can pay off that month. 

The work I do now as an organizer, mentor and coach allows me to help other people take back their power and design their lives, homes and relationships with things and money to serve them.  I get to be part of the resistance to the culture of "stuff" and part of the movement toward creating sustainable more spiritually fulfilling lifestyles.  

Not everyone can afford professional personal organizing and coaching services so I put togther this list of books that helped me find my peace with stuff by changing my relationship with things, money and ultimately with myself.  I learned to not blame myself and release the shame.  I learned to be more compassionate with myslef and gave myself the time to learn and understand the sources of my addiction and attachment to things that led to clutter.  I learned that aur culture and business practices have serious flaws that make us extremely vulnerable to clutter.  If we aren't consciously shaping our own relationship with things, it's incredibly easy to be sucked in by the undertow that has led to an epidemic of clutter, addiction, anxiety and depression and to a way of life that is ultimately unsustainable.

These books don't just whine about the way things are but also offer suggestions and ideas on how to get back on track and make things better.

Scott Simon: Affluenza: The All-Consuming Epidemic

"We are a nation that shouts at a microwave oven to hurry up."

If you can relate to this quote, you may already have Affluenza.  The definition of affluenza, is

"a painful, contagious, socially-transmitted condition of overload, debt, anxiety and waste resulting from the dogged pursuit of more."

It's like a virus that feeds on our desire to be more, have more, and make life be as easy and convenient as possible.

It feeds on our desire for novelty.  We love new beautiful things.  So we buy, buy, buy.  We can't just leave beautiful things in the store when they are so cheap and easy to take home, right? We stop thinking about what it will really take from us to own the thing, not to mention dispose of it down the line.

Affluenza is not only crowding our homes, it's threatening to destroy our environment.  We simply can't continue to live an economic system that profits from promoting the ultimately unsustainable lifestyle centered around the aquisition of things.  This book explains the symptoms of affluenza, how it became an epidemic, and what we can do about it.  According to the authors,

• The average American spends more than $21,000 per year on consumer goods
• Our average rate of saving has fallen from about 10 percent of our income in 1980 to zero in 2000
• Our credit card indebtedness tripled in the 1990s, more people are filing for bankruptcy each year than graduate from college. 
• We spend more for trash bags than 90 of the world's 210 countries spend for all their consumer good needs.

This books explains the historical, political, and socioeconomic reasons that affluenza has taken such strong root in our society, and offers practical ideas for change. They provide examples of people who have already opted for simpler living.

 

 

Juliet B. Schor: The Overspent American: Why We Want What We Don't Need

By the author of 'The Overworked American' and 'Born to Buy', this book delves deeper into the marketing, brand consciousness, and breakdown of neighborhoods, and many other factors that have led us to a society based on consumerism. She also describes the backlash Simplicity movement, in which people focus on living and enjoying life rather than working at jobs they hate to support a lifestyle of spending and acquisition.

If you want to understand the factors that influence you constantly so that you can choose your life rather than be unconsciously moved to compulsive and impulsive shopping and spending, this book will shock and surprise you and then ultimately empower you. 

Joel Bakan: The Corporation : The Pathological Pursuit of Profit and Power

I love this book.  And the documentary of the same title is extraordinary. As I've said many times now, clutter is a direct result of out-of-control, impulse spending.

Much of this spending is spurred on through extremely manipulative marketing designed to make us want things we don't need. 

Why are corporate marketers so aggressive about this? - purely to make a profit for their coroorations. Social ethics and moral responsibility are so often NOT part of a corporation's identity.  Their "morals" only exist where we have legislated them.

They don't want us to think before we buy. It's simply not in their best interest to care.   I'm not advocating that everyone become a radical.  Corporations have done a lot of good in the world.  But the bigger they grow, and the more they market to children using devious tactics, and the more we start seeing schools and public art centers being named after corporate sponsors (e.g., the Garden State Arts Center is now the PNC Bank Arts Center), and the more corporations like Coke and McDonalds are fighting tooth and nail with school districts to have the right to take over school cafeterias, the more we have to start wondering:

• just how far will their campaigns to manipulate us go? 
• what will stop them? 
• What will the limits be?   

This documentary explores the development of the corporation, it's marketing tactics, and it's social and environmental impact.  It is chilling.  They use video segments of actual interviews with CEO's, top marketers, and even top business professors.  It's utterly amazing and enlightening the things they have to say and how they make no apologies for their behaviors.  One top exec even says "Is it moral what I do?  I don't know.  It's not my job to think about that.  It's my job to get people to buy." 

They examine how corporations influence world wide politics, schools, our health and our food supply.  I wish everyone could see this movie or read this book.  I can't remember when I've been as deeply affected by a movie as this. 

And now, it's time for me to get back to work!  If you got this far, thanks for reading this. If you've read any of these books, I'd love for you to add your thoughts! 

All the best,

It's not about your stuff!: Thoughts about letting go

Just wanted to share my latest inspirational find.  When I found this blog, "It's not About Your Stuff" by Jessica Duquette I got so excited!  Our philosophies are so similar! I am working on a new workshop called "Let's Clear Your Clutter! The Permanent Clutter Clearing Solution" and I'm so excited about including her as a resource.

To me, clearing clutter is really about getting to the true meaning of clutter.  I don't believe that clutter is just junk that needs to be gotten rid of -- Clutter is stuff that is undermining your ability to function effectively.   

According to Merriam-Webster, clutter is:

Function: verb
1. to run in disorder
2. to fill or cover with scattered or disordered things that impede movement or reduce effectiveness -- often used with up

Function: noun
1. a crowded or confused mass or collection

Everyone has minor clutter spots, but if you have extensive or chronic clutter, it is a symptom that something in your life isn't working for you.  To clear clutter for good, you need to understand the true reason it's there.  Is it just that you lack the skills to organize your stuff?  Sometimes it is that easy. But extensive chronic clutter is most often deeper than that. 

Extensive chronic clutter is almost always a physical manifestation of deep fears & insecurities, indecision, inner conflicts, resentments, depression, pain, loss, trauma, lack of communication within a family, and more.  In almost all of these situations, the there is an underlying fear.  Clearing clutter for good means recognizing those fears and deciding not to let them control you any more. 

Even if hire a professional organizer to help you, they should respect that you need to let go of fear in your own time, in your own way, based on your own personal reasons for the clutter.  It's not just about getting rid of stuff, it's about letting go of fear on a physical, mental, emotional and spiritual level and trusting that you will always somehow have what you really need. Clearing clutter for good is about:

• Identifying the underlying issues and what benefits you are getting out of the clutter, e.g., security, insulation, revenge, or perhaps its an expression of your rage   
• Resolving conflicts, clarifying values, facing fears, and communicating from the heart
• Making decisions based on your values and needs, not out of fear.

As Jessica says, it's not always about letting go of fear, sometimes it's a matter of learning to manage your fears. 

I  highly recommend taking a few minutes to read Jessica's blog and thoughts on Letting go...She is a gem.  As she says "I couldn't have said it better myself!"

It's not about your stuff!: Thoughts about letting go. 
By Jessica Duquette "The Diva Of Letting Go"

All the best,

PURRfect Contentment

There was a book out several years ago called "Everything I Need to Know about Life, I Learned from my Cat".  One thing I learn from my cat, is that even though getting your To Do's done is important, sometimes you just gotta relax and enjoy what you have already done. 

Taking breaks, stopping to treasure a moment, a smile, or something as simple as hugging your cat (or your child) are the real keys to enjoying life.  Without that, getting your to do's done is a hollow achievement.

Click the photo to see it larger.  And, don't forget to vote in our poll!  : )

p.s. Yes, Alex's tail is huge - He's a Maine Coon.  Hard to believe we got him from a shelter, isn't it?   His owner just surrendered him. 

All the best,

Breaking Free from a Prison of Clutter - One Family's Story - with Photos

Step 1 - Working up the Courage to Make the Call

I'm currently working with a truly sensitive, warm, kind and generous woman and her family.  When she called me in December, she was terrified of what my reaction would be to the condition of her home. Even though we haven't finished, she wants to share her story - photos and all - just in case it will help others in her situation get up the courage to make the call and begin the journey of breaking free from clutter.  How awesome is that? 

When she got up the courage to call me, she was surprised to find that I didn't criticize her at all and I wasn't shocked. I only wanted to help  - that's why I got into this business - to really make a difference in people's lives.  Most organizers I know feel the same way. 

Step 2 - Getting to Know the Family, Their Situation  & Needs
My client, whom I'll call Sofie to conceal her identity, is a 26 year old mother of 3 beautiful kids and is married to an incredibly patient man who is by nature a neat freak.  When she lost her mother several years ago, she took in all the stuff her mom left behind.  She just couldn't bear to part with any of it - it would be like losing her mom all over again.  The stuff became a way to fill the emptiness and distract her from the grief inside. 

She then began shopping compulsively as a way to escape from her pain and get a brief high.  As you can see in the photos below, over time, her home became so cluttered that you literally had to move stuff out of the way to walk from place to place.  We are only showing one room here. More rooms will be covered in the project profile we are creating for our Before and After Gallery. 

CLICK THE "BEFORE" PHOTOS OF THE DINING ROOM / COMPUTER DESK / HOME SCHOOLING AREA TO SEE IT LARGER

As you can imagine, the tension, frustration, and stress level was so high among all the family members that fights broke out over every little thing.  Everyone dreaded coming home and no one could relax.  Sofie began to realize that if things didn't change, she might lose her husband and family.  She knew it was time to start letting go of the grief and the clutter that came with it.  She started going to organizing websites for inspiration and made many attempts to organize.  But because of the overwhelming amount of stuff, stress and tension, it was impossible to maintain any of these attempts.  The family couldn't support her because they really didn't know how.  No one could remember what they were supposed to do. Each small attempt was inconsistent, and wasn't part of a complete solution. When one space was cleared, it just became the new convenient place to dump stuff.  It was overwhelming for everyone.  That was when she realized she needed a professional to really break free.

Step  3 -  First Aid
During the first hands-on session we worked on what I call "first aid".  We addressed the biggest safety and health concerns, and got bathrooms and kitchen cleared and cleaned.  We also got the cat's litter box out of the bathroom and out of reach of the one year old by putting it in a small closet on the second floor. 

Step  4 -  The Plan
During the second session we had a family meeting.  During this meeting we established family goals and put them in writing.    The goal is to create a functioning, spacious home that allows them to have the loving family they all want.  A home they all enjoy coming home to.  We then set up a 3 part plan for getting rid of the clutter so that we can start really getting organized. Here's the plan.  It's sounds simple, but it's not easy.  It takes a lot of commitment and emotional strength to let go of old habits. 

1. No More Stuff - Everyone agreed to stop bringing unnecessary stuff into the home - no more buying, and no more gifts or freebies from others that there simply isn't room for.  We started documenting a set of guidelines for shopping, gifting, and accepting freebies that will help prevent the clutter from returning.

2. Support Each Other - As anyone with an addiction knows, you can't just stop doing something that is filling an emotional need without replacing it with something else...so we set up some alternatives to buying stuff - healthier ways to fill the void.  In addition to frequent telephone calls with me, here are a few of the things the family decided to do to support each other:  Start noticing all the progress and good things each other is doing.  Thank each other every day for something you appreciate. Spend time as a family without TV, and other stuff.  Have meals together and listen to each other's day.  Give each other clutter-free gifts such as trips to the day spa, massages, or babysitting time so the other can get away for a while.

3. Clear Space and Purge - This is where we go through everything they have collected and start letting go of the past as well as anything that isn't loved, hygienic, or used regularly. Some treasured things that have been damaged or are literally disintegrating will be photagraphed for a digital album. 

Step  4 -  The Purge

To date we've had several purging sessions.  We've made great progress in improving the functionality of the main areas of the home.  We've filled the dumpster a couple times and now have a lot more clear surfaces and functional areas.  Much of the good stuff has been sorted like with like into bins, labeled and put out of the way until the purge is complete. 

Sofie has come to love purging!  Once you get a taste of the freedom and energy it brings to purge the past, it's exhilirating!  She and her husband are now doing lots of it on their own. 

TIP: As we purge we are taking all the empty containers and putting them in our own little "container store".  When we need a container we "shop" there - for FREE!  : )    Here are a couple photos that show the progress we've made. 

CLICK THE "ALMOST AFTER" PHOTOS OF THE DINING ROOM / COMPUTER DESK / HOME SCHOOLING AREA TO SEE IT LARGER

We've cleared the desk and gotten all the important TO DO papers in one place.  We've made a temporary home for important things like receipts, planner, wallet, and homeschooling lesson plans and worksheets. 

We still have to empty all the drawers, bins and boxes that haven't been sorted and purged yet, but we are getting close. 

Once we finish the purge, we'll have space to put things away the things that are truly used and loved.  THEN we'll determine what, if anything, needs to be purchased to make the home function well for them.

UPDATE:

Here is a photo of her desk after we completed going through everything and decluttering.

I rearranged her workspace and desk to create an "L" and placed her file cabinet right next to her to make it easier to file instantly - instead of creating To File piles.

Using mostly things she already had, we created a simple hanging file system, a desktop project filing system, receipt system, kid's artwork system, mail inbox & processing system and gave everything a home.

The old table you see next to the desk in the prior picture became an art table for the kids.

_______________________

I hope you've found this mini-project profile inspirational.  See more Neat Living Home Office Makeovers here. Remember, no matter how cluttered an area has become, there is hope.  Sometimes you just have to make that first call for help to get started. 

Sending Neat Thoughts,

If I can be of service to you, I am available for coaching by telephone, so don't be afraid to call!  Life is too short to put off getting help any longer.  My contact info can be found at www.neatandsimple.com

ThinkBuying: Boston Globe Slams Corporations Pushing Bad Food on Kids

In keeping with my series on ThinkBuying, I wanted to share with you this excellent post from the Sugar Shock Blog. 

Link: SUGAR SHOCK! Blog: Boston Globe Slams Big Food for Pushing Bad Food on Kids. 

Here's an excerpt from the Globe Article that will really make you think about the damage junk food and sugar are doing to our health. 

"TYPE 2 DIABETES is sweeping so rapidly through America we need not waste time giving children bicycles. Just roll them a wheelchair. Forget the basketballs and baseballs. Give them Braille flash cards. The next thing you know, iPods, Game Boys and Xboxes will come with glucose meters, beeping 'Sorry to interrupt your song or movie, but it will not continue until you use me.'"

Corporations will eventually have to realize that in addition to making money, they are citizens of this country and world.  As citizens, they must be responsible to a higher value system that just making money.  If they don't start to really get it soon, then social responsibility will have be legislated.  They know very well that the sugar and chemicals in our food is killing us slowly and are  primary factors in chronic inflammation, diabetes, cancer, heart disease and more. But they make so much money on it that they can't seem stop themselves from continuing to sell the junk!  They need external pressure to quit.   Just like the cigarette manufacturers needed it to stop advertising to kids. Heck half the reason I quit smoking was because of all the grief I got for it.  They are as addicted to the money as we are to the sugar & hydrogenated oils in the junk food they sell! 

They can say "parents have the right not to buy it"  "parents have to control their kids" and that's true.  But then, they MUST stop actively and purposefully UNDERMINING  PARENTS through their deceptive and manipulative marketing. Conversely, we need to stop using sugar as a reward for every good thing we do, or to celebrate.  Why must sugary cakes be at every birthday?  I don't know...I suppose sugar is no different from all drugs that make us feel good when we ingest them...and then later we pay the price. 

Anyway, it's great to see a newspaper taking on  big companies even though they put their advertising dollars at risk.  Not many news outlets are prepared to do that. 

Kicking Sugar Update
So, enjoy the column and check out the extensive program on kicking sugar. You can also listen to FREE replays at http://www.fasttrackkicksugar.com/

I haven't totally quit sugar yet - but I have dramatically reduced it.  The hardest part for me is giving up my morning coffee.  I used to use 3-4 sugars in a 15 oz mug.  And sometimes I'd have 2 or 3 mugs!!!  Thanks to Connie & Nancy Appleton's suggestion, this morning I used only one sugar in a much smaller 7 oz cup and it was tolerable.  After a week of 1 tsp, I'm going to go to half tsp for a week then 0.   If I can do that....I can do anything!!!!  I really loved my morning coffee - just like I used to love cigarettes...but I quit them..and I'll quit this, too!

All the best, Ariane

Link: SUGAR SHOCK! Blog: Boston Globe Slams Big Food for Pushing Bad Food on Kids.

ThinkBuying - Huh?

What is ThinkBuying? 

(I found this term at http://www.thinkbuying.com/ but I'm giving it my own meaning here.)

Many of us, including me, put a lot of effort in researching products before we buy.  I've always focused on getting the lowest price and the best quality and features for my money.  In the background, I've occasionally given some thought as to whether or not I'm buying from an ethical company, but how could you possibly know? Before the advent of the web, researching who you buy from was an extreme effort.  Not anymore! There are tons of websites to help you think before you buy.  (see the list at the end of this post)

I found these sites after watching a film called  "The Corporation" on Sundance this weekend. I was quite shaken up by how much I didn't know.  It really rocked my world.  It led me to look deeper into corporate ethics and what I could do to make a difference in influencing the impact huge corporations are having on our society, culture, values and even our personal lives. So from time to time, I'll be sharing some of my journey and learnings about the concept of ThinkBuying with you.

ThinkBuying may not seem to directly relate to organizing, but think about it.  Why do so many people today need help organizing?  From personal experience, I can tell you that much of the clutter I help people deal with is a direct result of out-of-control, impulse spending. Much of this spending is spurred on through extremely manipulative marketing designed to make us want things we don't need - purely to make a profit for the companies - not to help us.  They don't want us to really think before we buy.  Part of helping people prevent clutter is helping them learn to take back control of what they spend money on and what they choose to bring into their homes. So that is part of ThinkBuying. 

Another part of ThinkBuying is thinking about how socially responsible the companies we buy from are.  Do they really care if our children are harmed by their products? Or if they are destroying the environment?  I'm not advocating that everyone become a radical.  Corporations have done a lot of good in the world.  But the bigger they grow, and the more they market to children using amazingly devious tactics, and the more we start seeing schools and public art centers being named after corporate sponsors (e.g., the Garden State Arts Center is now the PNC Bank Arts Center), and the more corporations like Coke and McDonalds are fighting tooth and nail with school districts to have the right to take over school cafeterias, the more we have to start wondering: just how far will their desire to manipulate us go?  what will stop them?  What will the limits be?   

Two college students have already become walking billboards to pay for their college tuitions. Including getting tattoos with the name of the companies.   Will the corporations also dictate what they can study?  Others have paid for their weddings by turning them into ads / reality shows.  Babies are used in commercials now, how long before children themselves are leased out to become walking ads just so parents can afford to raise them and give them all the stuff corporations are selling? 

So, what I'm suggesting is not that you become a radical, but that we become more aware of how we are being manipulated and maybe that we take just a few minutes to think before we buy.

Wishing you nothing but the best,

Ariane

~~~~~~~

Here's how to see "The Corporation" for yourself:

• TV:  Sundance Channel - it airs again on Jan 16.  If you don't have a TiVo or DVR,  find someone who does to record it and watch it with. 
• LIBRARY: If you can't do that, try a library.
• BOOKSTORE:  You can also get the film and the book at Amazon:
    DVD - The Corporation - 2 Disc Set with Tons of Bonus Footage
  BOOK:  The Corporation

Related Interesting Material

• DVD: Wal-mart:  The High Cost of Low Price

Cosumer Education Websites

• Organic Consumers Association
  The OCA promotes food safety, organic farming and sustainable agriculture Great information to make informed food choices and understand how Genetic engineering, irradiation, hormones, etc. are used in our food supply.
  
• SRI | alonovo.com
  The Social-Responsibility Index, or SRI is a rating of business character or citizenship. The higher the index the more likely we would want such a business to thrive within our community. This website is a great source to help you make conscious decisions.
  
• The Corporation Film: Welcome
  If you haven't watched the film / documentary "The Corporation" yet, I strongly recommend investing 2 hours and 25 minutes to learn some stunning facts about the the history of how corporations came to be in the first place.
  
• Commercialization of Education 2005 Annual Trends Report
  Univ of AZ report:  schools are a prime corporate advertising targets.  Learn what's being marketed to children in schools, what's being done to try to stop it, and the lengths corp's are going to fight parents & schools from banning junk food.
  
• Campaign for a Commercial Free Childhood
  National coalition of health care professionals, educators, and parents seeking to limit direct marketing to children.
  
• Links to Organizations -Social Responsibility
  Links to Organizations Concerned about Social Responsibility and the Effects of Rampant Consumerism
  
• Transnationale.org
  This is a  "citizens' portal on brands and corporations". You can search for profiles on over 9,500 companies. Profiles list their social & environmental records
  
• CorpWatch : Index
  Features news, analysis and exposes about various corporations with records of environmental, labour, or social injustices.

Words for your Walls

Link: Words for your Walls: Decorative custom lettering for your home.

This is a cool site!  You input the text you want, choose a font, and they make a clear decal that you can put on your wall for inspiration!  Great Idea.  I think I'll try this for my office when I repaint in 2006.

Goal-Free Living and Blogging can be a GOOD thing!

BRILLIANT concept!!!  If you enjoy blogging, Goal-Free Blogging is a must-read post by Stephen Shapiro, author of Goal Free Living .  I’ve been blogging since August and I also have found that blogging is best as an adventure and a journey - not a goal. It started out as part of my organizing business, but now it’s much more than just about organizing and productivity.  It's about learning, discovery, insights, sharing and community just to name a few. And yes...it's so much more fun and insightful when you just let it flow rather than set goals and objectives for the blog.  At first, it was tough.  But now, ideas for the blog just hit me all the time. And, I think it helps me be a better organizer as well.  It stimulates my creativity and innovative problem-solving. 

I can’t wait to read Goal Free Living - the new Book by Stephen Shapiro coming out in January.

I suspect Goal-free concepts can be applied to helping my clients enjoy getting and staying organized, rather than seeing it as a dreary task or goal that must be done.  If you see organizing as a chore, then it is.  If you see it as a way to creatively make your life easier and more fun...then it will be! 

Why wait to enjoy life "once I get organized".  Start enjoying your life NOW!  : )

All the best,
Ariane

Clear your Clutter with Feng Shui by Karen Kingston

If you or a loved one hang on to too much sentimental stuff, this is the BEST book I know of to help you "reframe" the way you relate to your things. It's very easy to read and will surely help you regain control of the stuff in your home. When I have a client that is having great difficulty letting of stuff, I give them this book to read.  It has always done the trick so far.  I even succeeded in getting my dear husband to let go of a ton of old stuff in our attic! An amazing feat! 

This book covers:  Why we keep clutter, how it affects you, the beneficial effects of letting go, and how to let go emotionally, and how to stay clutter-free. (see also "Clutter-Free Forever" in the Controlling Clutter category of this blog) 

Karen Kingston clearly and concisely addresses sources of clutter, such as paper clutter, sentimental clutter, and clutter that comes from other people - and what to do about them.

Feng Shui is about "balancing and harmonizing the flow of natural energies in our surroundings to create beneficial effects in our lives."  Some people think there it is about superstition and luck.  Some people may use it that way, but I don't beleive that you will get rich by putting a purple candle in your wealth calendar.  What I know is that if you have balance and flow in your environment,  you will be more peaceful, and more able to recognize and respond to opportunities that arise.  Essentially, by paying attention to energy, you can make your own "luck" or as I like to think of it - "positive outcomes in your life". 

Let me know how it works for you.  : )

What Is the Neat Living Mission?

People aften assume that Neat Living is about being a neat freak, or being obsessed with being tidy. Well not to me. That is not my intention at all. So what do I mean by Neat Living?

Let's start by defining Neat.
(I've combined definitions from Word Reference.com, Merriam-Webster and Dictionary.com.)

neat (nēt)

1. Free from dirt and disorder: habitually clean and orderly free from clumsiness; precisely or deftly executed;
2. Free from dilution: STRAIGHT
   free from irregularity: SMOOTH
3. Marked by tasteful simplicity; refined; elegant
   
   
4. Showing care in execution; marked by skill or ingenuity: ADROIT, PRECISE, SYSTEMATIC
   
   
5. NET as in (neat profit)
   
   
6. Free from what is tawdry or unbecoming: FINE, ADMIRABLE

Neat Living: Philosophy & Lifestyle
In choosing the name Neat Living, I seek to embrace ALL these definitions! Neat Living to me means living a lifestyle that incorporates all these definitions by striving to be:

• Habitually clean and reasonably orderly
• Marked by tastefulness, simplicity, ingenuity and elegance
• Seeking peacefulness and good health
• Owning fine quality things that add value to our lives - not stress
• Living profitably by taking care on oneself, and using one's skills and talents to be of service to others
• Demonstrating admirable qualities such as strong ethics and generous charity to those less fortunate

Note the word "habitually". I love that word. It doesn't mean perfection. To me, it means "most of the time". It means we strive to be our best, knowing that we won't always achieve it. We are all human. Another aspect of the definition I like is "free from irregularity, SMOOTH". I think of Neat Living as a lifestyle that values SMOOTH as in peace and serenity.

So how does organizing fit into this picture?
To me you can't truly experience Neat Living if you are living with lots of clutter, always late or rushed, or chronically disorganized. You need to be organized enough to be in control of the things you own rather than letting them control you and cause you stress. Your things should serve you. Neat Living is a quest to use skill, creativity and determination to:

• Keep things simple
• Develop the habit of using time wisely to meet your goals
• Aquire and keep only the things you really love and use
• Give everything you own a home where you can find it if you need it.

My Personal and Professional Mission
My mission as a professional organizer and educator is to facilitate people learning skills and developing habits that enable them to experience Neat Living.

My hope is that through this Neat Living Blog and the Neat Living Newsletter, I can help people who struggle with getting and staying organized, can't afford to hire an organizer, or who are reasonably organized, but like me, are always on a quest to improve.

This blog is also a great way to for me to help my clients stay organized through continous learning and reinforcement without having to charge them for repeat visits.

So, that's what I'm about. If you like my Neat Living philosophy, then I look forward to having you as a subscriber to the Neat Living Blog and the Neat Living Newsletter

I want to hear from you!   
I hope you will also share your questions, ideas, comments and thoughts with me through email or the blog so that others can learn from you as well. I may share email content I receive with others, but I will only use your initials to maintain confidentiality.

All I ask is that you be civil and constructive if you have a criticism or disagree with me on something. There's room for many different philosophies in this world, and I can always learn and improve, but like most people, I don't learn well from insults.

Wishing you peace and sending neat thoughts,

Light Up Your Open House and Sell!

If you are selling your home, one way to accentuate your home's best features is to light them. For example, if you have a great fireplace, you can put uplights on the mantle, or perhaps flank the fireplace with beautiful floor lamps on each side.   Lighting is also a key Feng Shui technique for enhancing the energy in a space.  Beautiful lighting makes you feel good, and feel good about the space in you are in, so it's a great way to enhance potential buyer's experience of your home.

Also consider using small uplights under plants to accentuate them and provide interesting shadows on the ceiling.To make a room feel inviting, lighting from lamps is far superior to overhead lighting. This is because overhead lights tend to cast unflattering shadows.

Click the photo to the right  to see it larger.  This is an example of one my lighting designs.  We put uplights on the top and in the plants on the side.  We put down lights inside the shelving unit to give it depth.  With this lighting arrangement, there is no need to burn candles!  We also hooked up all the lights to a single switch to turn them on and off.

 Your lighting plan should call for lighting each area of the room with lamps or task lighting as needed.  If you have several lamps that you would like to turn on all at same time, link them all into one extension cord, and then plug that into a single flip switch which plugs into the wall.  You can buy these at hardware stores, or home stores such as Home Depot or Lowes.

Lighting can also be used to help you get motivated to organize and keep things neat! If you have an area that you tend to be messy with, casting a light on it will help you keep it neat. For example, once you've organized the items on a shelving unit, lighting up the inside of the unit will help motivate you keep the shelves neat!

To take your home lighting to the next level, check out the lighting ideas at Lighting Showplace! And don't forget to choose Energy Star products to help you save on your light bill.

Click here to take up to 33% off at LightingShowplace!

All the best,

Great Site for Getting Things Done - Even if you aren't a Mac User

Thanks to Mervin Mann at 43 Folders.com!  When I found his blog, I discovered David Allen and "Getting Things Done".  This is an excellent and very extensive site with tips and "hacks" to help you manage your time, your paper, your to do's and your life!  It's geared toward MAC users, which I'm not, but I love the tips!  I especially love the "Hipster PDA" idea.  Without giving it away, it has a real sense of humor and REALLY gets back to basics.

Another great resource I found and I'm planning to test out is a TO DO managament software tool called  NeatNotes!  Gotta love the name.  I almost used that for the name of my newsletter!  I'll activate the link to get it after I've evaluated NeatNotes.

All the best,

Is Wal-Mart Good for America?

Dawn over at www.frugalforlife.com posted an extremely thought-provoking post on Walmart and the new Wal-Mart Movie. Frontline also did a Wonderful show on "Is Wal-mart Good for America?"  Clear facts and figures about Walmarts business practices.  You can watch the full 60 minute program online at http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/walmart/view/   While you are at it, check some of their other shows like "The persuaders" about the advertising industry, and "The Secret History of Credit Cards"

Here's what I have to say on the subject of Walmart.

I have already seen several documentaries on Wal-Mart and agree with a lot of the points and comments on Dawn's post. I personally stopped shopping at WalMart years ago. And, we are fighting having them come to our town. Being 10 miles from New York City, we are not even close to rural.

Our town, and those surrounding us, have vibrant downtowns filled with unique shops. That's one of the things we love about living here. We aren't a carbon copy filled with chain stores and we want to keep it that way.

Wal-Mart does indeed lie and unethically maneuver the system in the pursuit of profit.  For example, they actually had a written policy that stated they wanted to keep wages within a limit so that people would qualify for medicaid rather than them having to pay for Health benefits.

They also said they would only buy American. Hah! They have killed more American businesses than they have helped. AND they buy a huge percentage of their stuff from Asia. Not only that, they use their buying power to force small businesses here to redesign their products to make them cheaper (and lower quality) or they won't carry their products.  In fact though, their strategy is to provide ridiculously low prices on endcap products to lure you in...and then most of their stuff is the same price you'd find at Kmart or Target.

Let's not even get started on how they use their power to censor artistic products like movies, music and books. I suppose we get what we deserve when we value low prices above all else. It's like when you hire a contractor just because they give you the lowest bid. You usually don't get quality. Or worse, you have to redo it.  The thing is low prices lead to low wages and eventually a lower standard of living.  For example, in ohio, massachusetts and vermont where factories (like Thomson electronics and Rubbermaid) were closed because they couldn't compete with China (Which most of Walmarts goods now come from China) A Walmart opens.  50 and 60 K per year jobs are now replaced with minimum wage jobs and rundown towns.

One last thing, I understand the argument that rural folks don't always have access to the product selection and low prices...but how did they survive before Wal-Mart? They had to be frugal, creative, simple and live with less stuff. Ironically, isn't that what a lot of us are trying to do?

Bringing mass consumerism to rural areas is not the solution. I don't mean to judge or offend individuals who do choose to shop at Wal-Mart. Having grown up on welfare myself, I know what it's like to be really poor.  I only hope to inspire people to think about it.

For really low prices, I think you can do better at Amazon.com or even e-bay.com, where they let everyday people sell their stuff to anyone, anywhere. It's like a big online flea market where you can get amazing deals. - Now that's democratic!

Okay, I'm off my soap box now. Have a great holiday And think about this...

What if you bought NOTHING at Christmas? What Gifts Would You Give? (Click to see 10 gift ideas that cost nothing or next to nothing...)

All the best,

Seeking Your Bliss, or "What Should I Do With My Life?"

SEE THE UPDATED VERSION OF THIS POST HERE

ADHD and Careers - How do I figure out what I should do with my life? What is my purpose?

 

 

The more I've learned about ADD, the more I wonder if it's really a "disorder" or a "symptom" that sensitive, creative personalities develop from living in a chaotic society with so many overwhelming choices and possibilities.  Think about it.  Aren't advertising, magazines and TV  messages actually designed to distract you from your own thoughts?

"What Should I Do With My Life?"

I was inspired to write this article by a client with ADD who is in the process of changing careers - again.  Many of us, ADD or not, believe it is important to do work you really love.  Yet many us experience great difficulty.  The search can be excruciatingly painful - especially when we feel we have to settle for work "we know we can get" just so that we can make a living.  The longer we are in jobs like that, the harder it is to get out. So many people are in jobs that they feel are eating them alive...and yet they stay. Part of this is because they feel that people will think they are unstable or unreliable if they keep changing jobs. Others are just afraid they that if they found a new job, it would be worse than the one they have now. Or maybe they would lose insurance, or they would never be able to get what they are being paid now. Everyone has their own situation to deal with.

And then there are those who relentlessy pursue the "What Should I Do With My Life?" question. They are looking for their "calling" or the experience of having work that doesn't feel like work because they love it so much. When it comes to answering this "Meaning of Life" question, there seem to be two basic types of people in this world. Knowers and Seekers.

Knowers
The knowers are people whose lives seem to follow a straight line path, like Mother Teresa or Bill Clinton. They knew exactly what they were meant to do from a very early age. They are focused and have acheived really great things. They experience turmoil like all of us, but in a different way. They are focused on HOW to get what they KNOW they want. The rest of us have to first figure out WHAT we really want. These are the "Seekers"

Seekers
Seekers long for a clear vision of who they are and a clear idea of what they should do for a living. Seekers spend a good portion of their lives seeking answers to these questions before finding what they were meant to do. We are on a constant journey to discover ourselves and keep up with who we are as we evolve. We go through periods of great joy and periods of change, turmoil, agony and self-doubt as we sort out answers to questions like:

• What will make me happy?
• Why can't I be consistently energetic and focused every day of my life?
• Why do I get so easily distracted?
• Why do I say things I wish I could take back?
• Why can't I find a job or career that I really love?
• Why do I stay in a job I hate?
• What should I do with the rest of my life?
• What is my purpose?
• What are the talents I have and how can use them to make a living AND be happy?
• How do I get the courage to change?
• I used to love doing "xyz" but I don't anymore. Why?

And on and on. Some seekers embrace the journey, others struggle. Some seekers become so distraught, they are often told, "You think too much" too. Or maybe "you have ADD", or "you are depressed and need an antidepressant so you can cope with the way things are. "

I should, I should, I should...
Whatever labels people put on you, being a seeker isn't an easy journey. Seekers are often misunderstood and often feel lost. We get so many messages about what we "Should" be like, it's no wonder we become our own harshest critics. Media messages and images bombard us with images of the perfect home, the perfect family, the cool and hip places to be and things to wear. They portray this perfect way to be that most of us can't live up to. They make it seem like you should never have to feel depressed. You should always be in control of your anger. You should always have a clear goal and direction. And so you think there must be something terribly wrong with you if you can't be at least a reasonable facsimile of all this hip, cool, savvy perfection.

Is Depression Really Bad?
Sensitive seekers often take these critical messages to heart. Any flaw is taken as a sign there must be some "disorder". Well, come on. We are all human! If 40-50% of are depressed or exhibit signs of ADD....is it still an actual disorder? Maybe we are just having a natural reaction to living in a society filled with media "noise". A society where people are afraid to let their kids go outside and play alone. Where everyone locks their doors and no one can visit anyone without calling first. Where we only get exercise by going to the gym. Where manners are a forgotten art. Where models and celebrities are worshipped over people of character. (can you believe the top 20 most popular searches on the internet world wide are about celebrities and TV shows?)

Maybe it's normal to be depressed and stressed out in this very unnatural enviroment. The majority of us do experience depression, anger, self-doubt, distraction, and mood swings. As humans, we need to feel pain sometimes. It's a signal from our higher selves that we need to change something. It could be we need to change an attitude, a habit, or even a situation or relationship. If we numb ourselves with medication or addictive activities to avoid our pain, so that we can continue to stay in jobs or relationships that are eating us alive...how can we learn to listen to and strengthen our inner selves to find a way to gather the strength and courage to change? To figure out how to successfully make a living in this society while still be true to our selves?

Is it unstable? fear of commitment? or healthy change?
There are a lot of labels for people who change jobs and relationshops "frequently" in pursuit of the finding a life that they love. But to me, if you are truly following your heart, and learning and growing from each experience, then starting and stopping different jobs, projects, hobbies, and even relationships does not automatically make you "unstable", unable to commit, or a bad person. Your personal evolutionary path may be different from others, but that doesn't mean it's "wrong."

How do you know the difference between "different" and "unhealthy"?
There is no simple answer to that. But, if you ARE NOT able to take care of yourself, pay your own bills, maintain a home, or keep making the SAME mistakes, or if you are getting the SAME negative feedback from, and having the SAME problems with everyone, and don't get any wiser or feel any better, you probably aren't growing, and need professional support of some kind.

You may even need medication to stabilize you while you figure out a better way to reach your goals. But it's worth getting a second opinion before you assume there is something terribly wrong with you because you haven't found your path to bliss in life yet.

Finding a life you love, means learning to accept yourself as you ARE, and not overly dwelling on what you wish you were or think you "should" be. When you start to learn from your pain, that's when you begin to grow, make peace with yourself and others, and ultimately find your niche in the world.

Follow Your Heart
When I was in the process of making yet another career evolution in my life, a dear wise friend of mine said this to me.

"Are you following your heart? If you are, the people who would criticize you for that are probably not the kind of people who have acheived great happiness or accomplishments themselves. Some of the most creative people in the world have been through many incarnations and have multiple interests and professions. They continuously learn, change and act accordingly. Adaptation is a great survival skill. So as long as you keep learning and keep doing your best, go for it. The people who love you, your real friends will support you."

I'll never forget that. It was an amazing moment of clarification, self-acceptance and peace for me. So which are you? A Seeker or a Knower? Are you following your heart?

"What Should I Do with My life?"
If you are interested in this topic, check out this amazing book by Po Bronson called "What Should I Do with My Life?" He provides heartfelt stories of true seekers who took incredibly diverse paths to find their calling in life and answer the question "What should I do with my life?." From the depths of depression, welfare, abuse, and more, the people profiled by Po, took winding paths filled with change and courage to eventually find their bliss. It was a wonderful inspiration to me in answering that question for myself.

All the best,

 

 

Feng Shui & Getting Married for the First Time over 40?

About 6-7 years ago I discovered Feng Shui. I read several books about it and most of it made sense. Some of it was just too "superstitious" sounding for me. But one day, I met a friend of a friend who had trained to become a Feng Shui consultant. At the time, I was 40 years old and still single. I had been engaged 5 times, and every time something horrible had happened (like he cheated on me) and it didn't work out. So I talked with the Feng Shui Consultant about it and he agreed to come to my home the next week and see if he could help me change the energy in my home and "make room" for and attract someone wonderful into my life.

I was skeptical, but figured it couldn't hurt. He came to my house and after making an evaluation of every room and the whole apartment, he made several suggestions. It was actually surprisingly easy to make the changes.  They made my home feel more inviting and spacious - so I figured it couldn't hurt. Here are a few of the changes I made.

Clear the Books!
First, he had me take all my books out of the bedroom. He said it made me "think too much" in relationships. Ouch. He was right.

No Dried Flowers
He also had me remove all the dried flower arrangements. Easy. (Dead things create stagnant and dead energy.)

Make Room
Then he had me clean out my drawers and closets and make room for someone else to share them with me. Sounds wierd, but once again, I needed to clear the clutter anyway so I did it.

Visualize What You Want
Finally I made a little area with pictures of my friends who had great marriages that I admired.

Results
Okay, so here's the thing, 2 months later I was dating my current husband and