NEAT & SIMPLE LIVING

Want to learn more about ADHD and what you can do about it? Join me at the "no cost" ADHD Awareness Expo!

Join us this September 12th – 18th for the ADHD Awareness Expo - a series of presentations, live chats, Q&A, and demonstrations. You’ll hear directly from the professionals and organizations who are working everyday to support YOU.

WHEN

September 12th – 18th

WHAT YOU GET

To help you learn more about ADHD and what you can do about it, Tara McGillicuddy and Dr. Rory F. Stern, have organized the first ever Online ADHD Awareness Expo.  

At no charge, with no travel, and no hassle, the online expo will help you cut through the confusion and provide you with the latest advances in treatment, supports, strategies, and resources from the leading experts, authors, and organizations serving the ADD / ADHD community.

And, I've been invited to be one of the presenters!  

The topics aren't set yet...but to be sure you don't miss out, why not take a minute right now to register - BEFORE you forget.  Don't be one of those many people who email me AFTER the deadline is past. : ) 

ADHD Awareness Expo

Is it ADHD or Creative Personality Type?

This has been one of the most popular posts on this blog since I first published it a few years ago...I thought it worth updating and sharing with my new subscribers.  This has been a very busy summer as I've been coaching full-time and working on a new book when I wasn't tending to our very first vegetable garden (we grew squash, cucumbers, tomatoes, lettuce, basil, and spearmint for the very first time ever!)  or dealing with all the unexpected distractions of life - like multiple car breakdowns, having to have a tooth pulled, or getting systemic poison ivy. So, I haven't been able to post as much as I'd hoped, or accomplish as much as I'd hoped, but that's one of the things I enjoy about "inspiration-based" vs. scheduled blogging...there are no deadlines!  : )  

UPDATED: 8-23-10 

Many ADHD traits are actually the same as those of people with "creative personality types" as described in the  MBTI.   Having a creative personality type doesn't mean you are an "artist" necessarily, though you may be. It's broader than that.  Creative personality types include people who love to explore, take risks, try new things, solve problems, research and continuously learn new things. They tend to get bored with anything that is too repetitive or that stays the same for too long. They thrive on growth, change and yes, novelty.  After all, growth and change implies novelty.  Something new the person is experience or is now capable of.  Growth is what separates us from machines.  Creative people "need" change and growth more than they need "stability" and security.   

I frequently wonder how my creative personality type (According to the  MBTI  I'm an ENTP) and ADHD are connected because when you compare the traits of both, it's striking how similar they are. The main differences seem to be in the degree, frequency, and impact these "traits" have on our lives. Both ADHD and the Creative Personality Types share many characteristics.  

Below is a list of ADD traits that I've culled from reading  ADD books.

COMMON ADD TRAIT DESCRIPTIONS INCLUDE:

• High energy and restless / Hyperactivity
• Impulsivity
• Takes on too many projects
• Loses interest easily
• High impatience
• May fail to follow through, forget appointments
• Tendency to hyperfocus and not be able to easily break out of it
• Tendency to see everything at once, to think "globally" and see many possibilities at once, making it difficult to make certain kinds of decisions
• Higher than average tolerance for chaos and change
• Often exhibit high risk-taking, high stimulation seeking behavior
• Often hyper-reactive and sensitive - Strong reactions to thoughts, noise, people talking, everything in their environment - may notice everything, or tend to shut down and become inattentive to everything, or a combination of both
• Tend to criticize themselves constantly
• Tend to always be scanning or hunting - looking around for anything that might be new or different, or out of place, looking to make connections, to see patterns, may not even be aware of this.  So they seem not to be listening when actually they are trying to take everything in, though sometimes they really aren't listening because they can't focus on just one thing that is coming in through their senses 
• Highly intuitive thinking
• Inconsistency of attention, mood

Now compare that list with the list I made from the descriptions of MBTI "creative personality types" which have both an "iNtuitive" and a "Perceiving" preference.   I have never seen anyone group the "NP" preferences as an archetype or temperament the way Keirsey and Bates identified four temperaments in  "Please Understand Me", but in my work with hundreds of people who have been labeled as disorganized for most of their lives, and / or have been labeled as ADHD, I see undeniable patterns that are helping me better understand what causes painful chronic disorganization, and more importantly, how to help people best overcome disorganization that is disruptive to their ability to function.  I've learned that organizing for people doesn't really empower them...it just reinforces their assumption that they "can't" organize themselves. Over and over I've found that even people who seem to have almost a phobia of organizing actually can learn to organize once they connect to the creative aspects of the organizing process and let go of the idea that organizing requires tedious routines.

According to the MBTI , there are 4 personality types with predominantly "iNtuitive"(seeing the world in terms of it's possibilities) + Perceiving (preferring improvising over planning) traits.  They are:

 ENTP (5%)       INTP (1%)          ENFP (5%)       INFP(1%)

The percentages indicate what percent of the population has each personality type.  As you can see, these types are clearly a minority.   Combined they are found in only about 12% of the population and 4-6% of women. (Source: "Please Understand Me" by Keirsey and Bates)   

Interestingly, ADD is thought to occur in 6 - 12% of the population.  It varies according to who you are reading.  But, regardless, the numbers are literally so close that they beg for closer scrutiny. 

So now, take a look at the list of traits I summarized from Please Understand Me" by Keirsey and Bates with my notes in brackets about how this could impact organizing and/or look like ADHD.

ENTP / ENFP TRAITS 

• Unusually Enthusiastic, [high energy and high enthusiasm is VERY characteristic of ADD)
• "Apt to express interest in everything" [this makes it very difficult to focus and make choices about how to use your time]
• Characteristically have an eye out for a better way [leads to constantly changing and not sticking to systems you create to organize yourself]
• Always on the lookout for new projects, new activities, new procedures [ a clear link to all those unfinished projects ADD is famous for]
• Always seem to be several jumps ahead  [Another hallmark of ADD brains that process informationally globally and often see patterns before others do. Many famous inventors and scientists who made significant discoveries are thought to have had ADD]

The list is stunning, for example, Alexander Graham Bell, Leonardo da Vinci, Sir Issac Newton, Louis Pasteur, Thomas Edison, Albert Einstein, Benjamin Franklin, Galileo and many more.   

• Prefers to "improvise" rather than create a detailed plan  [Could look like impulsivity, being uprepared, etc.] 
• Tends to proceed into action without necessary preparation
• Can succeed in a variety of occupations as long as the job "does not involve humdrum routine"
• In a routine job "they become restless. If a project in which they are engaged is no longer challenging, they tend to lose interest and fail to follow through - often to the discomfort of colleagues"
• "Orderliness in the routines of daily living is not apt to inspire them."
•  "Not likely to be interested in the routines of daily maintenance"
• "Life with ENTPs is likely to be a daring adventure: this could lead families into physical and economic danger" [The book actually says this...could easily come out of a book on ADD]
• "Apt to react with delight at having an opportunity to improvise a solution to a crisis"
• "Likely to be inconsistent with their attention"
• "May show undependable, fickle characteristics, and be easily discouraged"
• "Always berating themselves for being so conscious of self"
• "Can become bored rather quickly with situations and people, and resist repeating experiences"
• "Enjoy the process of creating "but not interested in follow-through"
• "Can have difficulty picking up on the ideas and projects initiated by others"
• "Extravagant generosity punctuated with periods of frugality"
• "Somewhat unpredictable"
• "Characteristic in their pursuit of novelty"
• "Outstanding intuitive powers"

INTP / INFP TRAITS

• "Can concentrate better than any other personality type" [Obviously similar to hyperfocusing]
• "Once caught up in a thought process, that thought process seems to have a will of its own for INTPS, and they perservere until the issue is comprehended"
• "Impatient with routine details" [Obviously impacts ability to "maintain" traditional organizing systems]
• "The INTP must be given an efficient support staff who can capture ideas as they emerge and before the INTP loses interest and turns to other ideas" [How I would LOVE this!  and How unrealistic this is.  The book is obviously old enough to remember when most managers had their own secretaries.  I had my own Exec Assistant once...it was AWESOME!!!]
• INTPS are often forgetful of appointments and the rituals of daily living unless they are reminded. [Need I say more?]

I think the links between creative personality types (not artistic creativity) and ADD are more than clear.  And the link between creativity and difficulty "MAINTAINING" organizing systems is also clear.  The key question for me is "how does my understanding of these specific personality traits help me help others become more organized by designing organizing solutions that they CAN MAINTAIN? 

That's what my class on "The Link between Creativity and Disorganization" is about.  

It comes as a free bonus when you purchase:

•  Neat & Simple Guide to Organizing Your Home Office: Ultra-Simple, ADD-Friendly Strategies for Conquering Chronic Disorganization, Clearing Clutter, and Organizing Your Life or 
•  Getting Unstuck: 8 Keys to Overcoming Chronic Disorganization

 

"Everything You Wanted to Know about ADHD but Forgot to Ask" - Free Teleseminar!

Time: 9:00 pm EDT 

Date: Tues August 24,  2010 

Got questions about ADD / ADHD? Get them answered by experts Dr. Ari Tuckman and Tara McGillicuddy. 

Don't worry if you can't make the live Teleseminar!  Members who register before the start of the Teleseminar will be able to listen to the recording free for 1 week on the ADDClasses.com site.

REGISTER HERE

Best Kept Secret for Overcoming Perfectionism is....

Be Kind to Yourself!

Are you surprised that this is actually one of the most effective strategies to help you Overcome Perfectionism?  It's true!

In the midst of pressure and stress, or when we make mistakes, or forget something important, it's all too easy to berate and criticize ourselves. How can you focus on your strengths, get things done, and expect others to treat you with respect if you are constantly beating yourself up?  

When you constantly criticize yourself without compassion and forgiveness, you are literally training others that's its okay for them to criticize you and not be compassionate. 

If you can't be kind and patient with yourself, how can you be truly be kind and patient with others? 

 I Propose a New Golden Rule: 

 Treat yourself as you would like others treat you. 

Try this strategy just once as an experiment, and you'll see for yourself:   

Every time you criticize yourself, try countering it with a "Yeah, but..." 

 For example, here's a typical self-berating rant:

"I can't believe I was late AGAIN! Sigh, no matter how hard I try it keeps happening.  What's the use.  What is wrong with me!  Why am I so defective!"  

[I know, if you are anything like I used to be, the above statement doesn't even compare to how harsh you can be with yourself, but I know you get the point. : ) Now, here's the "Yeah, but..." strategy at work....]

 "Yeah, but, look at how much better I'm getting at this. Where I used to be late 80% of the time, now it's only 20% of the time. I'm really making great prgress and that is good enough! As long as I'm making a sincere effort, and make an effort to make up for whatever hardship my mistake causes, people will have to forgive me and move on.  I'm doing really great in the big picture.  I will take a lesson from this relapse and next I will {fill in effort you will make to be more on time]  I CAN and will do this!   

There now.  Doesn't that feel much better?  Here's the thing.  It's a verifiable truth: 

  PUNISHMENT DOES NOT WORK 
 TO CHANGE BEHAVIOR
 FOR THE LONG TERM.

Compassionate reflection, making amends, forgiving and encouraging yourself to do better work MUCH better.   How would you treat your child if they made a mistake?   If you treat yourself kindly, you'll be amazed how much kinder you become to everyone around you.  You can't help it. 

As you develop a better relationship with yourself, your relationships with others improve.  I GUARANTEE it. 

With this lesson in mind, I'm preparing to take a mini-vacation to Maine for the holiday and to focus on writing for the next week.  I'll need to remember this lesson often as I write my drafts and try to perfect them. I hope this helps you remember to be gentler with yourself, too. 

Would love to hear about ways you will commit to being kinder to yourself as well as any successes you are having in doing so.  Just click on comment below. 

And if you like this post, please share it with others using the SHARE, RETWEET or FACEBOOK "Like" buttons below.  Thank you!

I wish you all a happy and healthy July 4th Celebration!

p.s. 

I'm celebrating the whole month of July as "Freedom from Perfectionism" month!  Our country was founded on the ideal of "liberty for all" and as we know, freedom is not "perfect."  It comes with lots of "taxes" and responsibilities. 

 As creatives and ADDers,  our price for freedom is that we have to learn to live with imperfection.  

So, I'm extending the $10 Sale price of my newest Audio Class program till July 30th!

"Overcoming Perfectionism: Everything I Know about Perfectionism, I Learned from my Breasts"

 

 

ADD - ADHD is real

 Kalstolyn, a college student shares her reality of ADD.

ADHD is real.  As you listen, notice the painful awareness and how acutely she realizes that she is so differenct.  Notice the impact of what it's like to have people constantly say things like.

 "All you have to do is...."    or "Why can't you just...?"  

 Imagine being diabetic and having someone say, "Why can't you just produce more insulin yourself? 

Well, we can't "just produce" the brain chemicals we need either.  We can only influence. 

As you watch, note that her views on ADD medication are her experience...she is right that people without ADD respond to ADD meds differently but just for the record, people with ADD also have a variety of responses.  Medication is also not a CURE.  It doesn't make you suddenly like every one else...it just makes it a wee bit easier to manage the ADD. 

There are several types of ADD and what she describe is the Hyperactive type ...not everyone develops Anorexic symptoms like she describes...and there is another type of ADD which is very quiet called Inattentive.

With that in mind...Everyone who has ADD or knows someone who does will benefit from listening to her description of ADD is for her. I cried while listening...it reminded me of when I was college and what it was like for me. I"m going to stop now to pull myself together...but please...do listen if you can. 

And to  Kalstolyn - Thank you so much for sharing your story and experience so that other's could learn.   I know how embarrassing it feels to admit the simple things that are hard for us...but you have NOTHING to be ashamed of and MANY wonderful qualities to focus on! 

Thanks to Bryan at ADDer World for sharing this. 

Check out ADDer World here

http://adderworld.ning.com/video/add-is-real

FOR MORE ARTICLES AND INFO ON ADULT ADHD 

 "What is Chronic Disorganization vs. Situational Disorganization?"

 "Is it Adult ADHD or Creative Personality Type?"

 "Myths and Facts about Adult ADHD" A Free 4 Page PDF Chart

How do I know what I want?

This question was asked by several participants in my latest program on "Embracing the Power of Good Enough".  It really got me thinking....  This question gets to the very heart of life!  It sure is relevant to my life right now.  Maybe yours too? 

I've been rethinking a lot of my needs and wants, lately.  Like this blog, for example.  

• How do I want to express myself with it?
• What purpose do I want it to serve for me and my tribe? 
• How do I want to share my point of view?  In small, realtime chunks like Twitter? or with well thought out inspirational and educational articles?  Do I want to be more transparent and share my thought processes about my work and about my own life with ADHD and a hyperactive creative brain? 

One thing for sure, I want to reflect on and write more about all aspects of life with ADD. In my coaching, I help people with all areas of life...so why aren't I talking about all of them on this blog?  

Almost 5 years ago, this started out as an organizing blog...but living with ADHD is SO much more than that. So I want to talk about all areas of life with ADHD, Creative Personality Type, and Highly sensitive personality including, Relationships, Career, Money, Health, Eating, Addictions, Emotional Self-Regulation, Boundary setting, and more.  

I want to talk about the meta-cognitive skills that truly empower us to live more effectively with ADD, not just the technical skills of organizing.  

Meta-cognitive skills like Decision Making, Filtering, Establishing Criteria, Prioritizing, Planning, Cost-Benefit Analysis, Goal setting, do not come naturally to creatives and ADHDers who prefer to open up possibilities,generate ideas, and keep options open. 

( Metacognitive Skills = The ability to reflect and assess the quality and process of one's own thinking, beliefs and understandings.) 

Skills such as Inner dialogue, listening, Motivating Ourselves, Valuing ourselves and embracing our imperfections and well as our strengths also do NOT come naturally to us.  We have to learn them from the ground up. 

So.this blog is going to shift again.  I'm getting ready to share a lot more...and I hope you are ready to go on this new phase of the journey with me!  

I'm not going to post stuff that I think can found all over the web...I'm going to post stuff that I don't hear people talking about very much.  Or, I might just start pulling out some "quotes" from conventional tips I find around the web and post how and why they do NOT apply to people with ADHD or how they might actually be biased against people with ADHD without even realizing it! 

I'm not interested in writing "tips" anymore.  5 ways to do this, 6 secrets to that...  UGH. I'm so tired of it.  It doesn't inspire me...so I think that's why my blog has been rather quiet.   If I'm not inspired, why would you be?  

I'm also rethinking my whole business and my role in it.  I'm working on hiring a Business Manager so that I can truly devote 80 - 90 % of my time to coaching, writing and creating while someone else handles the technology and business aspects.  

So how do I know what I want?  One way I know is by how I'm feeling.  Another is to listen to my own complaints and excuses to figure out what I'm really frustrated about and use them as a stepping stone to get to what I DO want.  E.g.  If I don't want that, why?  what is it I really want instead?  And sometimes, I have to look at my wants and expectations to see if they are realistic...or need adjustment. 

If I want to hire a business manager tomorrow...well, that's too bad.  It just ain't gonna happen.  I have to allow time to become ready to welcome the new Bus. Mgr. into my life.  "Become ready" means I have to organize and rethink everything I do through the lens of "what if someone else could be doing this for me?  What would that take? 

What do I want?  I want to stop saying: 

 "I can't do that project, or finish that book, or that audio program because I'm too busy trying to keep up with email, setting up autoresponders for classes, sending out reminders, fulfilling orders for products" etc.  Why?  Because I don't have a system for delegating these jobs to someone else.  

But I can't just STOP saying that....I have to do something differently. I have to replace those thoughts with something positive AND specific.   Like "How can I create a system for delegating?  Who would be the right person to help me do that?" 

I WANT to be INSPIRED...to have time to really think, reflect, and express - whether writing or teaching. I want to be able to put on more classes and coaching groups.  I want to MAKE the time to do it by giving over the actual implementation to someone else.

So, for a while...I'm going to experiment with using this blog to inspire myself to make this happen and hopefully inspire you too.  I'm going to use it as more of a journal of how my thinking is evolving...what I'm learning...what I'm clarifying for myself. 

With that intention and inspiration in mind, here are just a few of the "bullet points" I'm incubating in preparation for the final session of the Getting Unstuck coaching program on June 17.  It's been a year and a half and I have learned and grown so much along with the members of the program.  I'm going to keep the community of 70+ people going for free for now...but I'm working on a sustainable way to keep the connection, healing, learning, safety, sharing, love and support going.  Once I have a Business Manager on board...there will be many new possibilities for me...and my tribe...to learn and grow together.  

So here are more of my thoughts on "How do I know what I want?"

• First, this is a much better than the all too common complaints "But I don't know what I want" or "But what if I don't know what I want?"  The trouble with those statements / complaints is they tend to cause people to give up in frustration and overwhelm.
• The question  "How do I know what I want?" is a great one because at least now your brain is inspired to start thinking about ways to figure out what you want!
• The question can also be very overwhelming though.  Why?  Because it's very broad. It's not quantified or contained in any way.  There are so many ways to answer it that we freeze up...it makes our brains explode or maybe even implode : ) 
• So what's the first step to dealing with anything overwhelming like that? Start narrowing the question itself.  When? where? in what part of life? for whom? from whom? emotionally? physically? materially?  Then keep narrowing it down till you get to question you CAN answer  : ) 
• Another thought....Keep in mind that what you want or need varies hourly...our whole lives are a journey of noticing and assessing what we want / need now vs tomorrow vs. next week or month, etc.  Where we have trouble prioritizing is in deciding which need is more important at any given time.  This hour you may NEED to eat...so your question might be:  How do I know what I want to eat?  Next you may be tired and need rest...your question might be "How do I know what kind of "rest" I need right now?  a nap? a change of scenery?  a walk?   Still not easy to answer for some of us, but much more doable.  
• Even more challenging, how do I know if what I want or need right now is just as important as what others need?  How do I balance my wants / needs with those of others? 
• Because we have to make SOOO many decisions like this every day....the more we can automate "templates" or guidelines for making wise choices the more we can lower our stress.  To make templates for decision making we need "criteria". Like "Even though I love to research every option, sometimes I need to limit my number of choices, without sacrificing my need for adventure, so that I make sure I have time for ALL my needs...not just the needs of the moment."    : )  
    

IThanks so much to my clients, blog readers, subscribers and fellow learners who continually inspire me to reflect on what I know and put it to good use helping others navigate the challenges and adventures of life with ADHD!  : )

Motivating Yourself to Organize + Chance to win a copy of my book - No Charge!

This week I gave a 30 minute mini-class on ADHD Coach Talk with Tara McGillicuddy.   We discussed "Motivating Yourself to Get Organized with Adult ADHD" plus a few of the inspirational concepts, tips and strategies from my book "Neat & Simple Guide to Organizing your Home Office" including how to get motivated to organize (and build your self-esteem along the way.)  We covered how organizing empowers you to improve your health, shed weight and so much more. 

Enjoy the class!  

p.s. If you would like to see more classes like this, leave a comment below and let me know your thoughts and comments on this class...

Listen to internet radio with ADHD Coach Talk on Blog Talk Radio

 

BONUS - Win my book free!

Listen to class to learn where to send a quick email to enter your name in a drawing to win a free copy of my book!

Deadline to enter:  Monday, June 7
 

 

Neat & Simple Organizing Strategies for Adults with ADD / ADHD

I'm giving a class for ADDClasses.com on 5/27.  I'll be sharing simple strategies that make it easier to organize when you have ADHD.  

REGISTER FREE HERE or to download this program and many other wonderful ADD classes,  join the ADD Audio Library!

Organizing with ADHD - Listen to recording of my guest spot on ADHD Coach Talk

This week I appeared on ADHD Coach, Tara McGillicuddy's Blog Talk Radio Show called ADHD Coach Talk. We had a fun and educational conversation about topics from my book "Neat & Simple Guide to Organizing your Home Office" like:

- What works best for organizing when you have ADHD

- Myths about organizing that hold us back

- Organizing for "innovating" and "harmonizing" personality styles

- Learning to use organizing as "stress relief" and a way to build your self-esteem

- How to become your own "designer" of solutions

- much more!

Thanks Tara for your great questions and making feel right at home on your show.  

Listen to "Organizing to Build Self-Esteem and Confidence with ADHD" or get the download.  If you like it please do share it with others!

 

Neat and Simple Guide to Organizing Your Home Office is now on AMAZON.COM!

I've been quiet for the past month but I've been a very busy girl! I've had a very full client workload, plus teaching and group coaching, plus my book is now finally AVAILABLE on Amazon.com!   (By the way, what a LOT of work to make that happen! I was really surprised by the hoops I had go through.)

I am so thrilled that I just had to share some amazing news with you --- to my astonishment it sold out over the weekend! I'm now busy making sure it gets restocked ASAP! 

I was also totally blown away by the outpouring of support from colleagues, fans and clients who have taken the time to post reviews that literally brought me to tears.  People often say thank you etc., but taking the time to actually write about it and post it in public is just beyond supportive and inspirational to me.  There just aren't words to describe how I feel right now! It makes the thousand + hours I put into creating the book over several years  all worthwhile.  

Thank you all from the depths of my heart.  I will remember your support for a long time to come...and when you need me, I'll be there for you, too!

Here's the link to check out the reviews.  And if you have read the book, would love to get your review too!  My goal is to get at least 50 reviews...there is no more powerful way to market the book than for readers to express their appreciation.  

p.s.  The book doesn't say it outright, but it was definitely written for ADDers and creative personality types.  After all, what works for us works for anyone!  Who doesn't like SIMPLE, FAST and EASY ways to organize?  : )   

   

Amazon.com: Customer Reviews: Neat and Simple Guide to Organizing Your Home Office

www.amazon.com

If you are looking for a simple, intuitive way to organize not only your office, but your LIFE; look no further. This is the ultimate guide to organizing with purpose. Something I didn't expect was how ...

Ritalin may increase Brain Growth, Learning Ability and Brain Plasticity

 "...Ritalin, like anti-depressants, appears to encourage not just an enhanced ability to focus, but an increase in brain growth, learning ability and plasticity." **

Please note that this is only one aspect of the latest findings in neuroscience research.  It does mean that there aren't other significant and potentially harmful side affects - particularly for children.  Also, there are non-pharmaceutical ways to stimulate brain growth and plasticity including exercise, certain kinds of games, meditation, mindfulness work, possibly neurofeedback, and probably many more yet to be discovered ways.

**Source: Bill O’Hanlon wrote about the latest research on Ritalin on Ruth Buczynski's blog.  He was also a speaker in NICABM’s learning series on brain plasticity and depression. Read the Full Article by Bill O'Hanlon here:   http://www.nicabm.com/nicabmblog/?p=722#

Getting Back On Track

Getting ready for our Getting Unstuck group coaching session today.  We'll be talking about "Getting Back on Track" after a lapse in a routine...like not exercising for a while, or not eating healthy, or not organizing, or letting clutter build up, etc.   

One of my favorite strategies is:

"Take some action in the direction you want to go - no matter how small it is - and give yourself credit for starting!"  
 

Trouble Sleeping? 12 Tips to Get a Good Night's Sleep

When you have trouble sleeping, do you reach for sleep aids to cure your insomnia? You are not alone. I used Tylenol PM and Melatonin for years to help me sleep.  

But did you know that the consequences of "chronic" sleep aid use can be devastating to your health?

Did you know that chronic lack of sleep aggravates and/or can even cause:

•  ADD-like symptoms such as distractibility and impulsivity?
• depression?
• negative attitudes?
• difficulty dealing with stress?
• poor school and job performance?
• chronic fatigue? 
• muscle pain?
• loss of immune function?
• obesity?
• increased risk taking behavior?
• increased self-medication and risk of addiction?
• difficulty managing emotions?
• difficulty making decisions?
• difficulty organizing?
• accidents?
• difficulty learning? 
• poor memory?

Getting Unstuck: 8 Keys to Overcoming Chronic Disorganization - Teleclass

"Getting Unstuck: 8 Keys to Overcoming Chronic Disorganization and Cultivating the Gifts of ADD and Creative Personality Type

DESCRIPTION

While there are no “simple, easy steps” that will magically “fix ” your problems, there is HOPE! You can succeed at organizing and have the more satisfying and fulfilling life you dream of. You can learn to navigate life and organize with confidence.

Making Peace with Your Morning Routines - Like Getting Dressed!

Today, I'm going to share with you one of the articles I wrote in response to a Getting Unstuck coaching group, member's forum question.  

Thanks to Sandy G for asking the Question:

"My hours and days vary week to week, so it's hard to get a routine going for myself, which has always been hard anyway. Any suggestions for me?"

I know everyone's case of difficulty with morning routines is not like mine, but I'm going to get real personal here and share my excruciating struggle with implementing a morning routine and getting dressed every day so that I could be on time and prepared for my days. 

Embracing Mistakes: A Power Tool for Getting Unstuck, Overcoming Procrastination, and Taking Action

You cannot make progress in life without making decisions. And can't take action and make progress, without learn to embrace making mistakes.

Most accomplished people will tell you - they could never have gotten where they are without making LOTS of mistakes.

In fact they make more bad decisions than good ones.

Thom Hartmann’s Hunter and Farmer Approach to ADD/ADHD

Below is an excellent post describing how ADD looks if you think of it as a "disorder"  VS.  How ADHD traits look with a positive "filter" which Hartmann describes as the "Hunter" view.

His theory is that ADD is a set of traits that were naturally selected for during evolution - ADDers made EXCELLENT hunters and were HIGHLY VALUED for their traits such as being able to:

• hyperfocus;
• react quickly;
• stay up easily at night;
• be highly flexible and adaptable;
• take big risks;
• tolerate change in routine;
• notice everything going on at once, and more. 

In our western society these traits are not an asset when it comes to doing routine, mundane, repetitive tasks...these traits are less common and in environments such as school, assembly lines, and administrative jobs, they can be a hindrance.  Because we don't "naturally" fit in to the "standard" ways of doing things, doesn't mean we truly have a "disorder".  By definition we are "uncommon" - about 6 - 10% of the population. 

 Okay so we aren't good at sitting still all day in schools and offices and doing what we are told.  We are natural initiators and problem solvers though. And in some environments...like professions requiring "diagnosis" or creative problem solving ... our natural traits / strengths are PERFECTLY suited and often valued.

Check out this interesting list! 

http://www.thomhartmann.com/2007/11/01/thom-hartmanns-hunter-and-farmer-approach-to-addadhd/

Here's another neat blog based on his work...  Hunter in a Farmer’s World  An ADHD Life

 

Ariane

Happy Thanksgiving!

Before I head off to Virgnia to spend the holiday with my husband's family, I just wanted to say Happy Thanksgiving to all my blog readers!  I'm so thankful for each and every one of you that has subscribed over the past four years I've been blogging.  It's been a great ride, and it's been wonderful to get to know so many of you!  Especially the 400 plus of you that have  joined me on Facebookwhere I post more often. I'm grateful for you too!

I'm also deeply and eternally thankful for the hundreds of women who have been a part of my Getting Unstuck program which started in January 2008, and to the core group of nearly 45 women I now consider my "soul sisters", that have been subscribers since the beginning.  Without you the group would not be the safe and inviting place it is. I love spending time online and on the phone with you!

Even for me, being part of this group of amazing women, has been powerful in so many ways.  

• I've lost over 50 pounds
• I've cleared some of my own issues with "planning ahead" and creating boundaries and structure.
• I've gotten my calendar automated so people can book their own appointments (what a miracle!)
• And now, I've actually planned and programmed the Getting Unstuck Group Coaching programs for women with ADHD / Creative Personality a FULL 7 MONTHS AHEAD!!!    

Seeking Participants for New Hoarding and Chronic Disorganization Documentary Series on the Discovery Channel

I spoke with Cecile, the producer  of this new documentary series on Hoarding and Chronic Disorganization today.  She is sending me the Pilot episode to review.  But in the meantime, I wanted to start getting the word out in case you might like to participate on the show and get free therapy, organizing and clean up services.  Here are some additional facts about the show:

1. They start filming in December and January - so act quickly if you are interested. 

  

2. They are recruiting the top doctors, authors and researchers in the field to provide free counseling for participants.

What is "Prioritizing" anyway? Why is it SO HARD? And What can You do About it?

When I read books on time management and prioritizing, I find that many of them focus on Prioritizing defined as reviewing your TO DO list and deciding what is

A - most important and urgent
B - somewhat important but not urgent
C - least important and least urgent

But for many of us, distinguishing what is important among the many things we care about, is made incredibly difficult by the way our brains and emotions work. Emotions and brain chemicals greatly influence what seems important or urgent at any given moment. We can think of something that needs to be done in one moment and be incredibly energized by it. It truly seems in the moment like the most important thing on earth at the time.

So we either forget about everything else and act on that feeling immediately, or we put it on our to do list in hopes of "getting back to it later."  Then, if you are at all like me, later comes around, I look at the item on my to do list, remember thinking it was so important, I but I can't for the life of me remember why! 

Has this ever happened to you?

Personally, I have NEVER been able to look at a list of Action Items, systematically prioritize it with A's B's and C's and then follow it exactly without getting frustrated. And honestly, I have stopped trying to do that. And you know what? 

Everything important gets done anyway.

Why? because there are many ways to prioritize and the ABC system (and the Covey System, David Allen's GTD, and the Julie Morganstern system) are only just a few of them! Furthermore, the ABC system is often NOT the best way for creatives and ADDers.

In fact, it is  often one of the worst ways! Why? because.......

Do you get extra stressed during the holidays? Relief is Here!

 
If you tend to get stressed by the holiday season, you are not alone.  Those of us with ADD and/ or creative personality types are triply challenged by all the possibilities and decisions of the season.  We face temptation at every turn.  We want ALL the cute decorations, we want to give gifts to EVERYONE, we want to send cards to EVERYONE and got ALL the parties. 

There are so many decisions to be made.  So much stress.  How do you add all these extras to your life without getting overstressed and overwhelmed? 

Sari Solden's Getting Unstuck Community Teleclass on "Creating a Fulfilling Life" - NOW FREE TO ALL! Join us on TUESDAY 9-22 7:30 EST

I just spoke with Sari Solden, and she has graciously offered to allow ANYONE who would like to participate LIVE in our special event with Sari Solden on Getting Unstuck tomorrow completely FREE!!!  

If you can't be on the call and would like to listen the recording, you can access it by becoming a Full Access member of either of our communities. (See info at end of post to join either or both communities and get the recording free.)

______________________________________________

About Sari's Interactive Teleclass

In this session Sari will share some of the core principles that guide her work as a result of over twenty years of work with men and women with ADHD. In this one hour presentation with question and answer session, Sari discusses her perspective on how adults with the differences, challenges, and strengths that often accompany adult ADHD, can move toward developing a fulfilling life.

She will explore the importance of managing your inner narrative by beginning to tell yourself a new story about yourself. Her underlying message is that when you accept the struggle instead of fighting against it, you conserve your energy. This allows you to more easily release your natural abilities and move in the direction of your values to create a meaningful life.

Sari will speak for about 30-40 minutes followed by a Q & A Session.  Join us to get your questions answered!  Submit your questions here. 

 

______________________________________________

About Sari

Sari Solden, MS LMFT, a psychotherapist in private practice in Ann Arbor, MI, has worked with adults with AD/HD for over 20 years. Sari is the author of Women with Attention Deficit Disorder and Journeys Through ADDulthood. She is a prominent speaker at both national and international AD/HD conferences, serves on the professional advisory board of ADDA, has served on the program conference committee for national CHADD and is a past recipient of ADDA's award for outstanding service by a helping professional. Her areas of specialization include inattentive AD/HD, women's issues, as well as the long term counseling issues for adults not diagnosed until adulthood. Sari currently hosts and presents on www.ADDJourneys.com, her online community for adults with ADD.

 

HERE'S HOW TO ATTEND!

TUESDAY, SEPT. 22

TIME

7:30 PM till 8:30 PM Eastern
6:30 PM till 7:30 PM Central
5:30 PM till 6:30 PM Mountain
4:30 PM till 5:30 PM Pacific


CALL IN -  OR -  LISTEN OVER THE WEB

Conference Dial-in Number: 218-339-3600
Participant Access Code: 773 236#

WEB: http://www.instantteleseminar.com/?eventid=8931225

Note:  The web stream has a 20 second delay - so you can't listen over the web and the phone at the same time.  However you can listen over the web, and then call in at any time.

Submit Questions FOR SARI NOW!!!

Anyone who has a question for Sari Solden can submit questions right now by going here.  You can also submit questions during the call. 

Look forward to seeing you there!  Leave a comment below if you have any questions!

 

HOW TO GET THE RECORDING OF THIS SESSION

Join Sari's ADD Journeys Community for BOTH MEN AND WOMEN!

Sari's community at www.ADDJourneys.com is where Sari regularly blogs and presents video and audio sessions.  Her community also features many other resources for ADDers such as discussion forums, a weekly audio message and a weekly "unVeg with Reg" session.  You can join for free as a limited member and then upgrade at any time to become a FULL ACCESS member where you will get access to the recording of this call plus many other awesome calls by Sari such as her recent teleclass on "Creating a Vision."  

Join my Getting Unstuck Community for WOMEN Only!  

My community provides  PLUS you get a monthly program which provides at least 6 hours of opportunities to interact with me LIVE VIA PHONE in our teleclasses, group coaching sessions, repatterning sessions and more.  PLUS you get FULL ACCESS to

• My entire portfolio of e-Books, worksheets, handouts and more. 
• Over 30 audio recordings and online workshops covering everything from Taking Charge of your Finances to Mastering Your Emotions to Organizing 101. 
• Discussion forums and blogs
• Live Chat with other members
• Opportunity to connect with a "clutter buddy"  
• 50% off my usual private coaching rates, and so much more! 

You do NOT have to have ADHD to become a member, but if you struggle with overwhelm, clutter, time management, planning, prioritizing, and organizing your life, you will fit right in! 
Learn more about the Getting Unstuck Community here. 

Overspending - 12 Warning Signs You Might Have a Problem

I'm working on my handout for my program on Overcoming Overspending which starts on Thursday Sept. 3 and thought I'd share some of it with you. 

_______________________________________________________

12 Warning Signs You Might Have a Problem with Overspending and Overshopping

• You use shopping as “recreation” and “retail therapy” without a budget or limits on what you spend.
• You have several items in your wardrobe that still have labels on them after a year.
• You are afraid to look at your credit card bills and total up your credit card debt.
• You’ve been borrowing from one credit line to pay back another.
• You frequently pick up the check and/or buy things for people even though you can’t really afford it.
• You have more supplies for your hobby (i.e. scrapbooking, fishing, etc.) than you will ever have time enough to use.
• You hide your spending / purchases from people you live with.
• You worry constantly about whether or not you can pay your bills.
• You rarely, if ever walk into a store without buying several things you didn’t intend to buy.
• When your spouse or partner disappoints you or hurts you, you get “revenge” by shopping or spending a lot of money.
• You think about shopping and spending money even when you are not shopping.
• You have tried to limit your shopping, but can’t.

If you are a woman who can relate to any of the above scenarios...and you want support to start changing your impulsive spending habits AND your life, you are most welcome to join us!

Here's what one of our members has to say about her experience in the program....

  "I am getting far more out of the Getting Unstuck program than I'd expected.  I've purchased many courses and info products, but they don't compare to this program.  This is real coaching, with real people..and it's really helping me clear clutter, and feel more empowered in my life. I have more hope and a positive outlook. Oh, and the program is also a great value."

- Sharon S    Listen to more testimonials here

JOIN BY SEPTEMBER 2 AT 5:00 EST AND SAVE $20!

After that the price goes back to $67.

REGISTER NOW

Click here to see all the Overcoming Overspending program details!

p.s.  In October, I'll be presenting a shorter version of this class (without the coaching) at the Virtual AD/HD Conference!

Sari Solden Confirmed as Getting Unstuck Guest Speaker! 9-22-2009

I am thrilled to announce that Sari Solden is our featured guest speaker for our Getting Unstuck Monthly Program in September!  Our theme for the month of September is Overcoming Overspending.  Program starts next Thursday on September 3!   (Dates are 9/3, 9/10, 9/17 at 11:00 AM EST and 9/22 at 7:30 PM)

All women are welcome to join our program - whether you struggle with Overspending, Time Management, Low Self-Esteem, ADHD, Chronic Disorganization, Clutter, Hoarding, or any other manifestation of difficulty prioritizing, making decisions, procrastination, and overwhelm, you will find support in these programs! 

_________________________________________

About our Special Session with Sari -
Sept. 22 7:30 - 8:30 pm EST

I have been a huge fan of Sari's for years now.  Even more so since I met her personally at the NSGCD conference last year.  Her warmth, openness and engaging speaking style along with her message of hope and acceptance, helped empower me to living openly with ADD and stop feeling ashamed of my weaknesses and imperfections so that I could focus on my strengths. In fact, I am a FULL ACCESS member of her www.ADDJourneys.com community where she regularly blogs and presents.

 

In this session Sari will share some of the core principles that guide her work as a result of over twenty years of work with men and women with ADHD. In this one hour presentation with question and answer session, Sari discusses her perspective on how adults with the differences, challenges, and strengths that often accompany adult ADHD, can move toward developing a fulfilling life.

She will explore the importance of managing your inner narrative by beginning to tell yourself a new story about yourself. Her underlying message is that when you accept the struggle instead of fighting against it, you conserve your energy. This allows you to more easily release your natural abilities and move in the direction of your values to create a meaningful life.

Sari's Bio

Sari Solden, MS LMFT, a psychotherapist in private practice in Ann Arbor, MI, has worked with adults with AD/HD for over 20 years. Sari is the author of Women with Attention Deficit Disorder and Journeys Through ADDulthood. She is a prominent speaker at both national and international AD/HD conferences, serves on the professional advisory board of ADDA, has served on the program conference committee for national CHADD and is a past recipient of ADDA's award for outstanding service by a helping professional. Her areas of specialization include inattentive AD/HD, women's issues, as well as the long term counseling issues for adults not diagnosed until adulthood. Sari currently hosts and presents on www.ADDJourneys.com, her online community for adults with ADD.

 

JOIN US!

I invite you to join us in September to GET UNSTUCK and GET INSPIRED to Overcome Overspending! 

We are also now accepting  registration for our October program on "Reducing Stress and Clutter with Better Boundaries" and our November program on "Prioritizing What Really Matters"
 as well! 

Professional organizers, therapists, coaches and other service professionals who work with the chronically disorganized, ADDers, and Hoarders are welcome to join our program for your own professional development as long as you are there to participate, share, and not just promote your services. From time to time, we are happy to feature our members in bonus teleclasses, and also have a new section on our website devoted to helping members get their small businesses started and create an appropriate online presence tailored to their unique business goals. We are helping them sort through the hype so that they can get unstuck in their business and get into action! 

Embracing Imperfection: The Value of the Cracked Pot : )

One of the members of my Getting Unstuck program shared this story in our community blog and I just had to share it with you!  Enjoy!

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots; each hung on the ends of a pole which she carried across her neck.One of the pots had a crack in it, while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water.At the end of the long walks from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.

For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do.

After two years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream.
"I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house."

The old woman smiled, "Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot's side?"  "That's because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them."

"For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table.Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house."

Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it's the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding.

You've just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them. SO, to all of my friends, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers on your side of the path!

Do not postpone Joy!